Wow, there's so many class/race issues in that one Obama t-shirt story! It's like a Tom Wolfe novel.

HOW CONSPIRACY STORIES ARE CREATED

Heres how the lunatic fringe works out their latest CONSPIRACY THEORY

Sirs:

Based on careful examination of the facts is appears obvious, an assertion that certain parties in this country will doubtless deny, it has become clear that the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives with the tacit support of a certain presidential candidate have introduced legislation that will lead to a worsening of the epidemic of obesity in the American populace. Follow, if you will, this chain of evidence as logically laid out herein:

1.) The press reports that US mortgage firms Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are beneficiaries of legislation introduced in both the House and Senate to receive ba-illions whether they need it or not.

This news was followed in short order by the announcement on:

2.) That Federal regulators seized IndyMac Bancorp, marking one of the largest bank failures in American history. Shazaam. Another hit to the purse-strings of the American taxpayer.

Then Monday comes the announcement that:

3.) Presumptive Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama asked comedian Bernie Mac to "clean up his act" after some of his jokes rankled audience members at an Obama fundraiser.

Careful investigation by the conspiracy theorist uncovers that:

4.) Yankee Group Research, Inc., claims that “nearly 80% of businesses have Macs in-house, nearly double the percentage that were using Mac for IT functions two years ago."

Finally, the big reveal: A New York Times article states that:

5.) McDonald’s is reviving their 1974 vintage TV commercial with the "two all beef patties, special sauce, etc.," jingle to mark the 40th anniversary of the Big Mac sandwich, in essence pushing a sandwich that is the staple of the diet of the rapidly expanding American consumer in this, the fast food nation.

So, as you must see, these simple news items become the basis of a conspiracy, a truly nefarious plot, to further entrap us in the clutches of high cholesteral and doctor dependence, a conspiracy created with tax payer's money and controlled by the US Government with knowledge and support at the highest levels.



Will this never end?

I remain your humble servant,

Jacomus d'Paganus-Fatuus