I'm not letting some minimum wage monkey look in my asshole just so I can visit the family for Thanksgiving. Sorry, Mom.

insert joke about explosive diarrhea

Why couldn't security use a giant flouroscope, and have every one walk in front of it. Kinda like Total Recall. I remember when I was young, every time we got new shoes in a shoe store in Camas, we would put our feet in them and they could see if they were a correct fit. I guess it was a flouroscope, I don't really know.

@ujfoyt: Cause they'd cause everyone that traveled frequently to get cancer.

Do flouroscopes really cause cancer? If they do, maybe they could use another form of scanning?

@ujfoyt - Wow, yeah - I always see those shoe flouroscope things on lists of "top 10 dumb inventions!" It was an awful lot of radiation for very little benefit - this article below says that a shoe model lost a whole leg.
http://www.orau.org/ptp/collection/shoefit…

We do have whole-body airport scanners that can see through your clothes, but I don't think they'd spot an assbomb. That would probably take X-rays, right? Like, a lot of them, and if you fly a lot that's too many rads. http://www.cnn.com/2008/TRAVEL/04/15/airpo…

I bet they could rig something up that you sit down on for a second, through, right?

There is a gamma ray machine that is in use at some ports to scan containers for illegal contents. I wonder if something like that would work. or a hi-speed cat scan?

Z-Backscatter? They have it in some airports, but it doesn't actually penetrate bodies.
http://science.howstuffworks.com/backscatt…
In other words, it won't find things in your rectum.