Oh man, why didn't I think of Celery. It's completely unnecessary, is probably an automatically renewing subscription service and caters to old people who frequently forget to cancel these things.

BANK!

I like the part where the old lady says she doesn't like talking to her daughter because her daughter talks too much. Good times!

I'd almost get one for my mom if I thought she was capable of using a fax machine.

WE DON'T HAVE TO FAX IN OUR TWEETS TO Celery!?!?!? OMFG.