If you go outside and make a spectacle of yourself, expect your photo to get taken. And too many Portlanders think that proper grooming and washing is optional. Young Andy Rooney is correct.

If you go into something with a preconceived notion of someone/thing/group... you'll find it.

Bravo to Mizz Beoutch! The only reason I would pay attention to something like the naked bike ride is so that I might get a chance to see a picture of a naked chick riding her bike. duh. But when I see the pics of the masses naked on their bikes, the first thought that comes to mind "Must smell like ass."

Sheeple do shit like this.

Given that it grows by some 2k people a year, quite a few onlookers must be cajoled into trying next year if not screamed at by hippie douchebags. Screaming, smug, lousy hippie douchebags, by my unscientific observation, accounted for about 1 in 400 people.

But as far as the smell rant goes, aside from a few, um-how-to-put-this, heavy-set, hoboish folks, it was really several nostril points above a typical day on TriMet. And that's coming from a non-smoking, olfactory snob.

This blog is so drenched with snarkiness I never know when to express outrage or enthusiasm. Is the joke on me for commenting? I'm confused.

Just because you can SEE the asses doesn't really make them much more SMELLable. In fact, the area directly under most people's back pockets, unless you're saggin', contains an ass. You just can't SEE the ass because of the pants. You can, however, SMELL it. Ever smelled a fart? In a crowd of clothed people? My point is made.

As for the people freaking out about cameras? I agree with young Mr. Rooney. Taking pictures of naked people at the World Naked Bike Ride is about as shameful as taking pictures of the Rose Court at the Rose Parade. Neither should come as any surprise. Both will attract a minority of creepy old men and a majority of excited bystanders looking for a way to prove that they did, in fact, see thousands of people biking around town naked.

Despite some riders' rudeness, many of this year's spectators will join us on the ride next year (which is why the ride's size keeps going up up up). Mizz Beoutch, I expect, will keep her smell-less ass far far away. I can live with that.

"attention-whore bullshit."

bullseye

"It smells weird outside!" "People are naked!" "There was yelling and moderate inconvenience on a Saturday night!"

You misanthropes have a fine set of problems there.

@Truckerspeed > Best Comment.

@Graham protest next year?

Carl,
Your seemingly thorough Assology 101 primer notwithstanding, I speculate that exposed smelly asses--much like neglected arm pits--are more rank than when buffered by one or two layers of clothing.

I did the ride and it was fun. I can't say I saw many people being rude or that many people smelled bad. This report is simply inaccurate. As far as attention whoring, I'm sure there was a great deal of that. But that's just people being people... In the end, I thoroughly enjoyed both the act of riding my bike naked all over Portland and of witnessing the spectacle. I am decidedly pro-naked bike ride after experiencing it. I suspect most people who saw or participated feel the same.

@Tiff: Yeah, and hopefully next year I won't be doped to the gills and have some motivation. Not enough LULZ happening.

Is it time to talk about something important again? Like the new Scott Pilgrim.

If you hate the bike ride so much then don't go again. Complaining for no good reason.

all the hatred for hippies or hipsters or whatever in that rant was kinda childish....but so were the people who were involved in a publicity stunt purposed to "raise awareness" for something and were protesting the people who were showing "awareness."

I mean it seemed to me that those people had no idea what the ride was about and just wanted to be naked with other people while drunk. And that's cool, but don't drunkenly harass people for watching you grope your friends in the middle of the road since you are no better than a "gawker" at that point. Just braver by some people's standards...or more foolish by others.

Take their damn pictures! Take all their pictures and smear them over the internet. If they don't like it, screw 'em! They want to ride naked in the streets then they gotta expect were gonna take pictures and put it on the internet. It's a freakish thing to do and they should be treated like freaks: And they like it!

hey cretins, do some research, feel empowered, support your fellow humans!!
http://www.worldnakedbikeride.org/
http://worldnakedbikeride.org/countries/us…

O, woe, woe is me, that I did end up trapped in such a horrifying den of intrigue as this, where inhibitions are tossed like kindling onto bonfires of whimsy with crazed, orthodox fervor... Why must I be doomed to mingle with those who coalesce around the interesting, the unusual, and the overlooked? Where can I escape the never-ending quest for craftsmanship and artisanry to find solace among the cineplexes, office campuses and theme parks? When will I ever find my way to that magnificent Eden of normalcy, that fabled Valhalla, that placid womb called Sugarland, Schaumberg, King of Prussia, Overland Park... where I can be swathed in the supple drape of LL Bean, partake of a never-ending buffet of Soup, Salad and Breadsticks, Bloomin' Onions and Mississippi Mud Pie, and be lulled into satiety by the supernal lilt of Nickelback, Jewel and Celine Dion, as though by sweet revelation itself? O tell me, what golden path can lead me from this repellent, art-choked cesspool to that place I long for, just beyond my dreams?

I-84 East. Go for it.

Hey Tommy,

Thanks for that original screed. You are so ready for open mic poetry slams.

Might I suggest a line?

"I pledge of allegiance to the United States of WAL MART....."

Get it?

If you'd like, TSW, I could come over and show you some lyrics I'm thinking of submitting to the Decemberists...

http://videosift.com/video/Mr-Show-Perform…

Nothing screws up a bandwagon more than having lots of people jump on it.

As someone who worked at the event who was on site for over 24 hours (Sat - Sun) let me clear up a few things:

a) you DROVE to a protest against oil dependency & the vulnerability of cyclists. Expect to get yelled at by the participants.

b) people coming to just gawk at 12k naked people are creepy. We tried to tarp off the fenced area to keep it private while we hung out before the ride, but there was still a line of fully dressed people just staring. Ick. While legally, yes, a public right-of-way free to anyone; practicality-wise, you were a creep for just coming down to stare. Lookie-looing while the ride is going on is completely different than sitting in your car and lurking at the site.

c) Heading up clean-up crew, yes there were quite a bit of cigarette butts on the ground, but first of all, there really weren't a lot of people smoking there. We hosted an event on a public throughfair and while not all the trash was ours, we got it all cleaned up by the next morning. People were super respectful of our garbage and recycling receptacles.

The event doubled from last year's 5 - 6k participants. I have been proud to been involved in it the last two years and hope to be involved for years to come.

haha ppl that hate the naked bike ride either have small weiners, deformed tits, are morbidly obese, or all of the above

Yeah, it's finding a balance between some inevitable photo-taking, and a full-on public photography event.

It helps that it takes place in the dark and the route isn't well publicized beforehand.