GOOD MORNING, STEVE! GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN!

HOW IS EVERYONE?!?

I KEEP HEARING ABOUT VARIOUS INTERESTING BIG-BOXISH STORES THAT ARE SUPPOSED TO OPEN UP IN THE URBAN CORE. NONE OF THEM HAVE. COSTCO. TARGET. UJAMIYA. THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS OPENING UP IS NEW SEASONS AND THEIR AISLES ARE TOO SMALL FOR MY FAT ASS.

Portlanders! Make your Fortune in the mysterious Orient! Join me in a sailing journey to China! The longshoremen are stocking the holds of the HMS Hipster with casks of Blue Ribbon 1844 down on the Willamette river and we sail at the next tide! An mere extra inch of PBR in the pint glasses of every man in China would mean millions of dollars for us!

NEVER COMMENTED ON A GMN, IS THIS HOW YOU DO IT?

THAT PABST IS A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT BEER FROM PBR. IT'S ALL MALT, NO FILLER, AGED IN OAK BARRELS, AND COMES IN A FANCY BOTTLE, WHICH COMES IN A FANCY BOX. $44 IS STILL A LOT OF MONEY FOR WHAT YOU GET, BUT IT'S MISLEADING TO SAY THEY'RE PAYING $44 FOR THE SAME CRAP WE PAY $1.50 FOR.

GOOD MORNING ALL!

GOOD TO SEE THE GOP WORKING HARD TO REDUCE THE DEFICIT AND BIG GOVERNMENT INTERFERING IN THINGS. WHAT'S THAT? THEY'RE GOING TO SPEND TONS OF MONEY SO THE GOVERNMENT CAN INTERFERE MORE ON IRRELEVANT THINGS LIKE WIKILEAKS? OH.

JEFF'S RIGHT, AND I'VE BOUGHT THE REAL PBR IN CHINA FOR THE SAME PRICE AS TSINGTAO. ALSO, I WOULD GLADLY PAY $44 FOR ONE OF THOSE FANCY PBRS HERE BECAUSE I ROLL LIKE THAT.

I DID HAVE PBR IN A FANCY JAZZ CLUB IN TOKYO, WHERE THEY CLAIMED IT WAS A FANCY IMPORT AND WERE CHARGING A LITTLE MORE FOR IT THAN JOHNNY WALKER, I THINK. SO THAT'S LEGITIMATELY A LITTLE SILLY.

WORST BEER IN THE WORLD IS '333' OUT OF VIETNAM, BY THE WAY! THE MORE YOU KNOW!

YES, WE LEARNED ALL ABOUT THAT PABST BACK IN JULY:

http://blogtown.portlandmercury.com/Blogto…

MAYBE AT "COSTCOS PORTLAND" THEY WILL SELL THE SAME STUFF BUT AT A 60% CHEAPER CUZ THEY CAN GET LOADS AND LOADS OF THEIR STUFF. I THINK IT´S THE ONLY WAY IT CAN SURVIVE IN THIS DOG EAT CAT ENVIRONMENT AND BLOOD THIRSTY BATTLE FOR SURVIVAL!

OHHH, GOOOOD MORNIIINNNGG!!!

GOOD MORNING BLOGTOWN! I WOULD LIKE THE GOP TO INVESTIGATE WHY THOUSANDS OF BIRDS ARE BEING ASSASSINATED... BY THE PORTLAND POLICE!

@REYMONT: YOU ARE WRONG, SIR. THE WORST BEER IN THE WORLD IS TUNISIAN LOWENBRAU. I HAVEN'T TASTED 333, BUT I DARE NOT BELIEVE THAT IT COULD BE AS BAD AS TUNISIAN LOWENBRAU.

@JEFF: YOU DID WELL.

@NUMBER SIX: CAPSLOCK OR IT'S ROVER TIME.

WELCOME JEFF!! GOOD MORNING ALL!

@JEFF: SOME OF US PAY $1 FOR OUR PBR.

@NUMBER SIX: CAPSLOCKS OR YOU GET SALMONELLA.

TOO MANY TASKS THIS MORNING HENCE A "GOOD AFTERNOON EVERYONE" COMING FROM ME.

@GRAHAM: YOU BEEN UP TO THE PARKING GARAGE AT THE TOP OF NEW SEASONS ON HAWTHORNE?, IT IS VERY AMUSING TO SEE PEOPLE TRY AND TURN AROUND THEIR GIANT TRUCKS UP THERE.

A COUPLE FRIENDS OF MINE HAVE SWITCHED TO HAMMS BECAUSE OF THE PBR PRICE INCREASES. IT ISN'T BRAND LOYALTY, IT IS PRICE LOYALTY.

@HUMANCLOCK: EXACTLY. I DRINK WHATEVER'S ON TAP FOR A DOLLAR, AND I KNOW WHERE I CAN FIND THAT ON WHICH DAYS OF THE WEEK. BUT STAY THE HELL AWAY. IT'S CROWDED ENOUGH AS IS.

@HUMANCLOCK & OREGOMETRY: BOG ON THURSDAYS IS SEVENTY-FIVE CENT PABST BLUE RIBBON NIGHT; IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW. ALSO, MY FAVORITE PARKING GARAGE IN ALL OF PORTLAND IS THE ONE IN THE POWELLS ON BURNSIDE. THAT SHIT IS scary!!!!

GOOD AFTERNOON BOOGERS!

COSTCO COOKIES AND GIANT BOTTLES OF ADVIL FOR ME PLEASE!

GOOD AFTERNOON EVERYONE!

I HOPE THE GOP ADOPTS HORATIO'S SIGNATURE MOVE-THE SUNGLASS WHIP FOLLOWED BY A CLOYING CLICHE. MUY CALIENTE!