Media Feb 9, 2011 at 1:41 pm

The Briny Kiss of Death

David Schmader
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Comments

1
Spike!
Chik-on on February 9, 2011 at 1:43 PM Report this
2
BACON GREEEASE!
on February 9, 2011 at 1:43 PM Report this
3
Stevia. As far as I know there are zero bad effects from shooting this shit into my veins.
on February 9, 2011 at 1:44 PM Report this
4
I season my dinners with useless, AARP-tilted blog posts.
Commenty Colin on February 9, 2011 at 1:49 PM Report this
5
meth
McAngryPants on February 9, 2011 at 1:52 PM Report this
6
I use other salts.

http://www.atthemeadow.com
($8239f8h248cerfehjf23@&*@ebdjhb23f237OCDBO#BD*(# on February 9, 2011 at 2:01 PM Report this
7
Dried-up monkey eyeballs!
tk. on February 9, 2011 at 2:13 PM Report this
8
Semen.
TWSS on February 9, 2011 at 2:23 PM Report this
9
msg. yum!
eric cantona on February 9, 2011 at 2:27 PM Report this
10
The tears of a thousand weeping orphans. Wait, nevermind- those totally have salt in them.
Joe Streckert on February 9, 2011 at 2:30 PM Report this
11
David,
Don't give up.
Try lemon. It's especially good on vegetables.
bikefor1 on February 9, 2011 at 2:42 PM Report this
12
DON'T GIVE UP, DAVID.

OH GOD, HE'S NOT BREATHING.

QUICK, GET ME A LEMON.
cat & beard on February 9, 2011 at 3:09 PM Report this
13
Jesus.... you do know that the overabundance of salt in a typical American's diet isn't due to seasoning food at home, it's due to the horrific amount of junk food they stuff in their fat mouths. I'm so done with this misdirected education. There's NOTHING wrong with salt! Just like there's nothing wrong with HFCS. It's an issue because these cheap flavor enhancers are in EVERY processed food you can shake a stick at. Simple fix: stop eating crap. Eat real food. Done. Fixed. You're welcome.
miracle minnie on February 9, 2011 at 3:24 PM Report this
14
@micacle ninmmie: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! YOU'RE A GODDAMNED GENIUS! WHY HASN'T ANYONE THOUGHT TO STOP EATING JUNK FOOD BEFORE YOU?!!? PATENT THAT SHIT AND YOU'RE GONNA WIN A NOBLE PIECE PRICE!!!
Graham on February 9, 2011 at 4:25 PM Report this
15
Thanks, Miracle Ninnie.

In all seriousness, I stopped using salt as soon as started finding toenail clippings in WSH's trash.
($8239f8h248cerfehjf23@&*@ebdjhb23f237OCDBO#BD*(# on February 9, 2011 at 4:30 PM Report this
16
Salt.
PDXwahine on February 9, 2011 at 4:53 PM Report this
17
Nothing. try it. Salt isn't a flavor enhancer, it's a mask. I'm salt free for 15 years...and I look mahhhhhvelous.
El Stunto on February 9, 2011 at 9:11 PM Report this
18
Salt absolutely IS a flavor enhancer. It increases the volatility of some good-tasting flavor compounds and suppresses bitter tastes.

If people salted their food to taste at home and THAT was the source of the majority of the salt in their diets, we wouldn't have an excess sodium problem. There's nothing wrong with that amount of salt. There IS something wrong with the amount of salt in processed foods.
Egret on February 9, 2011 at 10:01 PM Report this
19
Go do some hard work or take a sauna. Sweat a lot every day. If you're not suffering from crazy high blood pressure or something, you can salt the hell outta your food if you sweat hard.
Sisya on February 9, 2011 at 10:59 PM Report this
20
"Salt is dangerous and cool, like Nico, and Mrs. Dash is sensible and supportive, like Natalie, and I was sure I would hate Mrs. Dash's fucking guts."

Now what can we do about *clever* writing like this?

frankieb on February 10, 2011 at 9:51 AM Report this
21
Cooking skill.
Rosy on February 10, 2011 at 11:45 AM Report this
22
If you wish to go salt free than certainly spices are the way to go. However i wish to point out that Sea salt (or Mineral salt as it is some times incorrectly described) is a whole different animal from plain table salt and it actually has heath benefits.
on February 11, 2011 at 2:26 PM Report this

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