NEX : DNF :: MERC READERS : NEX

Okay Nex, you convinced me. This game sounds great! I can't wait till I can buy the $20 game of the year edition of this.

Sadly Rusty that's probably inevitable. No matter how much vitriol I spew or how many other gaming writers give this thing terrible reviews (http://www.metacritic.com/game/pc/duke-nuk…), it's going to sell like homophobic, misogynist hotcakes.

Because the world sucks so very, very hard.

As a confirmed cultural elitist with a wide and ever-expanding collection of beard combs, I love it how anymore Axe Body Spray is culture short hand for bro-dog douchebaggery.

This was an awesome review. I haven't played console video games probably since Duke was still king (there's a PS1 copy of Total Meltdown in my closet somewhere, I'm sure), and so the nostalgia for this franchise is still strong.

But alas, it seems like they've done with it what the entertainment industry in this country seems intent on doing anything with an ounce of nostalgia: unimaginatively re-hashed it in an absurd and over-the-top way that makes it completely unenjoyable to anyone that enjoyed the original(s).

See also: Star Wars, Indiana Jones, the Karate Kid, every '60s rock band.

I think they found a new kind of horrible for video games. Not like Carrot Top horrible, but Ted Bundy horrible.

So I guess the joke is that all this time, 14 years of development or whatever, and what they were really trying to do was out-Daikatana Daikatana.

Good review, thanks!

I find this review extra amusing coming from the dude that was zotted for a horrible rape/murder joke.

There's your metatext Andy.

If you find me offensive, just imagine how horrible this game has to be to drive me to write the above review.

(Answer: Very horrible. Very, very horrible.)

Wait, Nex you did what?

Getting offended over a joke is a good example of failing at life.