I don't know, calling a string of anal beads a "pearl bracelet" seems just a little dishonest.

But using them as intended can earn one a "pearl necklace," Todd.

I'm never having a garage sale again. Too many crazies, not including the Craigslist weirdos who show up at 7:45 AM with a truck already full of shit they bought elsewhere.

garage sales seem like a really shitty way to interact with the community, anyway.