I could not agree with you more. It's one thing to encourage acceptance of oneself and others, and it is an entirely different thing to re-create exclusion in reverse.

That said, most people feel the need to belong to a group. For most of us, "the whole of humanity" is not a specific enough group to satisfy that need. Therefore, whatever group we belong to will necessarily have members, and non-members. Defining both members and non-members is important. Sadly, some people are especially cruel during this process, but the intent and the outcome are the same whether cruelty is present or not. Unfortunately, you seem to find yourself stuck between two groups, both of which will exclude you in rather cruel ways. Lucky for you, there is a third, much less vocal, group in which you are always welcome. It's called "the rest of us," and I am a proud member. We're happy to have you.

Yeah, people suck, basically.

Interesting, because I was there too, knew nobody, am a size 12, and everyone seemed supportive, charming and friendly.