Comments

1
Shit happens.
2
Wow. I think, in the moment, you did what was best for you - but enough time has past. If you like this person and want a second date, (or a re-do on the first), tell them the truth. Every body poops.
3
Ai ai ai. Overthinking is the mind killer. All you had to do was text "I'm sorry. I got sick. Don't know why. I'll call you tomorrow. Sorry again!"

"I got sick" is all she (or we) needed to know. But thanks anyway, and thanks also to the Merc staff for posting this at lunchtime.
4
Contact this person directly, don't write an I,A. Grow up.
5
Blabby is an asshole.

When my parents met they were both still in the Army, stationed in SC. My mom told me that on their second date they decided to go for a picnic out in the country side. On the way, my mother asked my dad to pull over so she could use the restroom, they were out in the forest somewhere, far away from a proper bathroom. She was wearing overalls, and...she ended up peeing on them accidently. She peed on them enough that there was basically no way she could hide it and had to borrow clothing from my dad. Their relationship lasted for about ten years, and resulted in two children.

So, cheer up, it might not be over with this fellow. He could still be your future ex-husband.
6
Once again, this site reminds me of why I'm glad to be married.
7
"I don't know what I ate"

Really? You don't remember lunch?

I barfed on my wife during an early date (due to illness). I think you just have a shit fetish or something, since you feel the need to tell others about it. Also:

"like a woman caught in the middle of a mistimed period"

I don't think you have any business dating women.
8
But barf fetishes are still Kosher, correct?

EDIT: "5 mins to EDIT or DELETE". That's new, and much appreciated.
9
Man what kind of garbage ass food do you eat where your butt is basically projectile shitting against your own will? Treat yourself better.
10
We can edit posts now? Can the system support "emdash", i.e. —
EDIT: ?

And yes, yes it can. Now I can be a loser much more efficiently! Thank you, science!
11
So..you thought it was ok to blast ass in the theater? Grody.
12
I had that happen after being vegan for 5 years. Got high, ate four McDonalds cheese burgers and had them coming out of both ends in no time flat.
13
At least he didn't get caught picking his nose at a football game like George Bush
14
G.R.O.S.S.- Get Rid Of Slimy Shit
15
This girl dodged a bullet. Leave her alone.
16
Never trust a fart.
17
what is it with people in this town being incontinent?
18
They drink too much and eat bad food.
19
this brilliant aural tapestry may well be the story of how things like this happen.

http://soundcloud.com/british-teeth/diarrhea-on-the-max
20
This is a great IA and there isn't much you can do about it except write an IA. If I shit my pants on a first date, there is no way i would say anything about it... and neither would any of you fuckers!
21
As a public service, Anon, could you at least post the places where you had lunch and dinner?

You might prevent a lot of future nightmare date scenarios if you'd be willing to do that.

Or, if nothing else, shut down a really dangerous taco truck.
22
are you a social retard? Go to the bathroom even if you have to fart, or you feel like you are going to take a shit.
no loss to her.
23
I don't think I have ever gone to the bathroom to fart. I fart when and where I feel. You always have a sense of how olfaction will percieve the stench and sometimes it contains only a minor ass aroma. Let em fly. Sometimes, however, it can be completely horrible at which time I will moderate how much and how fast I let em out as to not saturate the environment with my fermented brocolli and poutine stench. Shitting is another ball game. I almost always shit in the bathroom.
24
Now, someone will name a band "Minor Ass Aroma".
25
Why did you play with shart fire on the first date? That is a professionals game in any case, but hey shitty balls to you for those sweet moves, even if it did 'pan' out

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