I've been trying to find work for over three months to no avail. And seeing as I've maxed-out my credit cards and have blown through my meager savings, I would kill to have one of those "degrading culture" jobs you mentioned. Perhaps you still live at home or have your living expenses covered in some other way, I don't know. Most people do not get to enjoy such luxuries.

I am, but nobody will hire me anyway because my diploma is from PSU.

Louis C.K.: "We know your job sucks. That's why we gave it to YOU."

Pay your dues like everyone else. Unless you're some sports prodigy, well-connected one percenter, or genetic jackpot-winning actor/model/reality show human stain, it takes for-fucking-ever to get a job with it all: one for which you have passion, has a future, pays a living wage, etc. Until then, you can volunteer, sell out, or stay in school. Most people don't get the perfect job right off the bat--they have to earn it.

two words: Sugar Momma (or Daddy)

yeah, she/he will be ugly and old, but that sugar will keep you free from the cruel joke/waste of life that is employment.

To all of you who can't find a job here: take a hint and move back to your parents place in the midwest. All you entitled assholes demanding a job, demanding it pay a ton, with awesome hours and your own office, I take great delight knowing you're struggling because you need it, because sadly for you your situation requires a bit of ego bruising. Gotta crawl before you can walk. We know, you're mommys special little soldier, you're WAY too important to make 10 an hour, and making 0 an hour is better for your ego (and laziness) than 10 an hour, right?

No pity.

The early 20's are a bitch, aren't they?

Don't worry, at some point you'll probably grow up and realize that the need for a job is NOT the worst thing that's ever happened to you.

If not, I hear you can follow the rainbow family around all year.

Obama - you know you're supposed to lie to potential employers about the degrees that you DO have, right? Nobody wants a college grad washing dishes. College grads have expectations and will complain all day long/do a shit job if you hire them to wash dishes.

"what are we going to do to improve this assed-out situation?"

Stop looking for work and watch Bonnie and Clyde, apparently.

The job market is bad in a lot of places, but it is really crappy in Portland. Even Seattle is significantly better. If you get desperate enough, you should consider moving on.

If I wasn't older and established in a job from pre-recession, I'd be really worried about finding work here, in my field, or in many others. This town seems like a big playground for a reason - because there is less serious economic stuff going on here.

If you are still young and listless, go study computer science. Head back to PCC or wherever and study programming. There is always work in them computer thingies. Not "web design". That is overcrowded. Nerdy back-room server and networking stuff.

Word. My programmer friends make bank/find jobs easily. They are, however, intelligent and driven people. I,A seems to be neither.

Does your resume reflect your grammar skills?

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY TOWN.

Until you're able to scrap together enough weed money to move out of your shitty apartment, here's something to ponder:

http://youtu.be/8kZg_ALxEz0

You don't get any coffee. Be a fucking man, get off your ass, and make this world a better place.

To all of you unemployed whiny ass mother fuckers:

AS OF RIGHT NOW, for today, there are 305 jobs posted on Craigslist.

There are 50 resumes posted on Craigslist, and a good number of them are for people not actually looking for work.

GO OUT THERE AND FIND WORK YOU LAZY FUCKING MORONS.

^i think the I,A was written by only one person.

Ugh, and amen, I,A! Also Blabby is right.....I'm up in Redmond (one guess working for whom) as I type this, working as a contractor and living in a furnished studio apartment on Capital Hill biding time until I can get a decent-paying job, again, back home in Portland. For our region, it's just here (Seattle) and the Bay Area that are competing for professional, good-paying jobs -- Portland's economy is too blistered and lackluster right now. Sad Face :(
So, consider moving -- it sucks but at least you ain't racking up your credit card debt.

..."Until you're able to scrap together enough weed money"...

http://www.amsterdammarijuanaseeds.com/mar…

@Barley O'bama - have you heard of Washington State? (it's north of the Columbia River)

Keep it local.

Wait, you can post your resume on Craigslist? Does that actually work?

onlysane - No. No, it definitely does not.

I don't get any commissions from Washington. Maybe if I post the picture of a Realdoll on Craig's List I might be able to get an actual date? Whatever became of Washington's birthday, anyway?

I don't vote. It only encourages the bastards.

Ironic? No. It's funny as hell!

Be a vampire. It's a vocation that really needs new blood.

@troll & Sane - Yes, yes it definitely does. I’ve gotten *several* people jobs just by rewording their shit resume and posting it on Craiglist. Veterans and civilians. Sometimes it only takes less than a week to find work on there. If you’re not pursuing every avenue and option, then you’re not “looking” for work, you’re sitting on your ass hoping that work will find you. Admittedly, 90% of the emails you will receive from craigslist are going to be junk, and 50% of the interviews you go to will be junk – but, if you keep it up, it won’t take long at all to find work.

Craigslist is still one of the most popular places employers look for talent. Now LinkedIn is the most popular.

Tip: Put only your initials and last name (no indicators of gender), email address and phone number. There’s no reason to list your address, when I hire people I don’t give a shit if they live in Beaverton or Gresham. If you want bonus points, list “Reliable transportation” on your resume, if you have a car put “Owner of reliable transportation”. Also: have a good friend review your resume, and look at the other resumes on craigslist to compare yours too (ask what elements you can borrow from theirs to make yours look nicer). Go through a weekly process of revamping your resume and tweaking it. Post one version of your resume at 8am, and another version at 12:30pm, every single day until you find work.

You will definitely find a job because your peers are lazy fucking bastards sitting on their ass and not doing this.

Fidelity - Interesting! I've never heard of any success with that method, but I'm also not about to post my email and phone number publicly online.

Luckily for me I have a job that I actually enjoy! As long as they keep upping the pay every 6 months and letting me make all the crass jokes I like, I will probably never leave.

Craig's List posts help want ads online for supposed employers looking to hire job seekers. So, I respond by email as requested. Half the responses I get are to remind me that I didn't provide a telephone number so that they can contact me. My reply to that is that they just did and so why didn't they just say when they would like to be inverviewed by me. Crickets. All I hear to that, is the lonely sound of crickets. The other responses ask me to give them a call; so I do. All I ever get is a recorded announcement to leave them my telepone number and that they will call me back. How come great big fancy pants corporations nowadays can't even afford to hire a receptionist to answer the fucking phone? I would be perfectly willing to hold for the VP to get off the other line and take my call, but Nooo0O0oooo! Instead, me, the unemployed is supposed to have the big bucks enough to employ a receptionist for myself. Fucking bullshit, man. I sit in the university and public library computer labs all day, trolling facebook and sending off resumes. There are no cell phones allowed in there, and there is no time for me to make it outside to answer the pocket pool vibrator. What am I supposed to do; sit outside and wait for the fucking phone to ring? Like the only one ad I would be able to respond to is going to result in an interview?

@ Barely O'bama:

awww...you're breaking my heart.

woe is you.

I don't care. It's like the title of this thread: "Fuck Work". It's not like I'm inclined to kiss ass anyway. The real point is that if we weren't in an extreme recession (in the field of economics there is no such thing as a depression) employers would condensed to setting appointments by email, and might even employ real receptionists. One other pet peeve is HR departments. They only work to try and justify their own existence. Once they ever actually hire people, HR is no longer needed. As long as HR has an endless list of interviewees, who all need to be carefully examined so that the best of the very best won't be over looked, especially with so many out of work, then HR hacks will maintain their own job security. Back in the day, a department manager or foreman did their own hiring. The accountant did payroll and that was all there was to it.

@Barely O'bama - If an employer posts an ad on craigslist they will often receive 5,000+ responses (at least the last time I did it). If you add in the words "Drug test" to the post, responses gets cut down to less than a thousand.

It sounds like you need to change your strategy. I feel you in that it's hard to find a job right now, but perhaps you're not outshining your peers? What could you do tomorrow (or as soon as you read this) to appear as a more valuable employee than the people around you? Are you talented? If not, why not? Do you reflect your talents in the way you communicate to employers?

Also, have you thought about starting your own business? Just because the economy sucks does not mean the market is dry. What commodities or services do you think this city/community needs, and how can you go about meeting that demand?

FYI, real companies won't treat you like shit through the hiring process. If you're getting played, stop and cut your losses. Also, I wouldn't recommend that you talk about business processes during your interview.

Here, here @Fidelity. As someone who hires people on occasion everything he/she says is spot on. Even the angry parts.

I am continually amazed at both the level of written material people put out there in resumes and portfolios, and their personal appearance when sitting for interviews or dropping off a resume.

You're still wrong on the gun debate issue, though.

The last time I was at an interview and was asked to pee into a cup, I grabbed the HR bitch's mug, unzipped my fly, and pissed in her coffee. I don't care for the bureaucracy which has over grown the hiring process and I especially dislike arbitrary, non productive gate keepers. Eliminate HR departments. Employees are NOT human resources; property to be exploited. They are men and women with dignity who deserve respect. Hire a skilled receptionist and competent book keeper. I manage to make a decent living, without all the cumbersome red fucking tape. Bring on the depression. I can't wait to see all the stupid dumb fuck employers get their comeuppance. Survival of the fittest.

@ Barely O'bama:

What is this, like your 6th account/username on this site? 7th? How long do you reckon it'll take for you to be banned this time?

You know, fidelity_axiom, it's really inconsiderate of you to be offering unsolicited advice. If you weren't so full of yourself, you would have read what I said before projecting your own personal wish list upon my resume; especially, sight unseen. I didn't say that nobody was interested. At the risk of repeating myself, what I indicated is that with all of the voluminous response which I have in fact received by email, invariably, everybody asks me for my telephone number. The funny thing is, not one of them has ever made mention of even so much as one of your concerns.

I don't give out a telephone number to anyone, because I don't employ a receptionist to properly service my incoming calls. Even though I continue to troll for jobs, I do happen to have a few bucks, and sometimes I even like to spend them. When I call a company to inquire about a product or service, only to be greeted by voice mail, I promptly hang up the phone. Do you think that I am the only consumer and/or job hunter who at the slightest inconvenience simply goes to shop elsewhere?

I rented an apartment one time. The agent asked me for bank references and my Social Security number. I refused. I said that I don't give out such personal information because I don't know who personally ends up in possession of it. She accepted my offer of a large cash deposit instead.

Turns out that the owner of the corporation that owned the apartments was Fahad al-Athel. Remember why Tony Blair resigned as Prime Minister of England?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/1999/ma…

Despite all the above, there is an even more fundamental reason for my blowing off companies that fail to utilize live receptionists as opposed to voice mail. My primary interest is in an inside business to business sales position, which is largely commission based compensation. If I'm on the phone with a prospect, or winnowing my way towards them, I can't be putting people on hold to answer my own line in order to put yet another prospect on hold. It breaks the patter and gives the up time to think of excuses to say no or simply hang up. It takes a highly skilled receptionist to keep a caller on hold, until the salesperson becomes available. The most unproductive thing you can do, is perpetuate rounds of phone tag. If my lively hood depends upon sales commissions, there is absolutely no point in my even considering going to work with a company that hasn't the wherewithal to employ good receptionists.

The FAL Group was started by its owner Sheikh Fahad Al-Athel.
Owner and operator of a residential complex in Portland, Oregon.

http://www.amhsco.com/ourgroup.htm


Mr. Bader Fahad M. S. Al-Athel, B.A.
Senior Vice President & Deputy CEO, FAL Group of Companies

Mr. Bader Al-Athel graduated from Portland State University in Oregon, U.S.A., in June 2007 and obtained his Bachelor of Arts degree in Business Management.

He joined FALCOM Financial Services in September 2007, attached to the Investment Banking Group, and served the organization for well over a year.

In January 2009, he joined FAL Holdings Arabia Company Limited (FAL Group), and is currently the Senior Vice President & Deputy CEO of the Group.

http://www.falholdings.com/management_en.h…

In the penthouse at One Jefferson Parkway, there was a photograph on the wall of Burt Reynolds with world class receptionist, Loni Anderson. Also, there was a photograph of Fahad al-Athel arm in arm, with Prescott Bush.

Where is that story here, by that native American fellow, who used to provide security at One Jefferson Parkway? Something about some witness tampering.