i love this, I LOVE THIS. anon, pay it forward! hell, everyone: pay it forward!

I'm curious how posters will now tell you deserved to lose your wallet or that the person who mailed it to you is an asshole.

50 dollars? I remember when you could get five lids of Panama Red for that.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST MOVE TO HILLSBORO??!1

Sorry, I was momentarily confused by a positive I,A.

the civility is making me uncomfortable because i'm not used to it.

Am not used to neither read half witted I,A's, it's been a while since one showed up. Just transform the written down story to a linear narrative form. You're welcome.

What kind of asshole just sticks a lost wallet in the mail and assumes that the address they're sending it to still belongs to the wallet-owner?! Like those smart people always say: "Assumption is the 2nd-cousin of all fuck-ups."

This is a classic case of some wannabe goody-two-shoes fuck-hole thinking that they're saving the world when really they almost sent an awesome wallet with $50 and some stamp cards for free coffee in it to some random person that might've been a rapist.

Besides, God might've put that wallet there for a reason, and who the fuck are you to question God's placement of wallets?

Anyway, Godly wallet-plans and joking aside, that 'wallet' could've been a bomb, or an oddly-shaped pile of dog shit. Mind you own business, folks. No matter how good it looks on paper, ALTRUISM IS FOR SUCKERS. And anyone who has the mind to pass up free money and coffee will never survive the imminent apocalypse.

"I noticed almost immediately after it fell out of my pocket" -- "You: person who saw my wallet on the ground and put it in the mailbox".

You're still welcome for another try.

NAH, THIS WAS A LONG-TERM THING. I POKED HOLES IN THE CONDOM YOU HAD IN THERE.