Well now I know what I'll need to cut in line at Salt & Straw.

That's strange, because most people LOVE it when people in line loom over their table.

Ableist? Is that even a real thing? You can't even be a breathing organism these days without somebody slapping a defamatory label on you.

You should've shouted "Well I'm gonna stand next to the guy with Cerebral Palsy! Line continues from HERE!" and then wandered off clutching your nuts after he punched you in them.

Maybe the dude was being a dick? Ever think??

C'mon Todd! Everybody knows Ceebies are to feeble to deliver effective nut shots.

Every time I walk by Laughing Planet and see the typical patrons inside my decision to never step into that place is reaffirmed.

I always feel so guilty when I eat a burrito. I mean sure it's 1000+ calories. But is it sustainable? Are these carrots organic? Why the fuck am I eating a burrito that consists of white rice + frozen vegetable mix? Oh yeah, Laughing Planet.

When you see people behaving in this manor; its perfectly okay to cut in front of them.