Yes. Your dog is cute. Why is it in the grocery store?

Nice fucking, dog!

That's three dog posts in as many days.

Dog post moratorium!

Hitler had a German Shepherd. Just saying.

I'A has never heard of service animals that jump on people and bark loudly.

Ahhh another new arrival in town.

This one is nothing but lies. LIES!

You could have scored and maybe even gotten
funky with him but nooooo you had to go and be an ass with his dog bung hole.

Don't say: "said coffee shop" when you're referring to the coffee shop you just mentioned in your above sentence. The reader will be able to understand what you mean if you say: 'the' coffee shop. They'll be able to tell it's the same coffee shop you previously mentioned I am certain.

How about the also perfectly valid "Aforementioned coffee shop"? You're entitled to dislike certain words or turns of phrase, but that doesn't mean that anybody else is going to avoid using them for your pleasure.

Totally NOT a service animal, I don't care if he has a vest on that you got off Ebay to make him look like one. You are a shitty human.

A dog is a lethal weapon. Pigs shoot them all time, just for acting protective. It holds up in court. First, shoot the dog before the master's eyes, then when the master attacks you directly for killing his dog, shoot him next. Of course it really isn't the dog's fault, so alternatively, since the master attacked you with a lethal weapon, shoot him first, then kick the dog in the teeth to give him a more than reasonable chance to back down. Naturally, you want to be in accordance with the Bill of Rights to the Constitution of The United States of America, at all times.