I am a faithful reader of your column. I appreciate the advice you give others whether I agree or not. I've also learned a lot and become more open to different experiences that people have. I am a 46-year-old woman who has been in sexless marriage for the last ten years. I've been with my husband for 25 years. Wow! More than half my life. I know what you're thinking, not another letter looking for advice in a sexless heterosexual marriage. That's not the case here. I read your advice in all those sexless marriages and ran with it. I've been asking my husband for more than a year to be in an open marriage and he always told me I was crazy. I asked him about intimacy and I always got the same answer, not tonight, I'm tired, I have a headache, the kids are still awake. You name...

Vivamus dui velit, vehicula non sodales a, aliquet sit amet orci. In lorem nulla, porttitor a nibh ac, auctor sodales libero. Phasellus sit amet consectetur urna, sed congue neque. Mauris a commodo arcu, sed commodo libero. Nam vel orci sapien. Pellentesque ac magna hendrerit, efficitur purus dapibus, facilisis est. Maecenas tortor ante, lacinia eget ante vitae, aliquet interdum tortor. Suspendisse potenti. Morbi quis bibendum arcu.
...

I am a faithful reader of your column. I appreciate the advice you give others whether I agree or not. I've also learned a lot and become more open to different experiences that people have. I am a 46-year-old woman who has been in sexless marriage for the last ten years. I've been with my husband for 25 years. Wow! More than half my life. I know what you're thinking, not another letter looking for advice in a sexless heterosexual marriage. That's not the case here. I read your advice in all those sexless marriages and ran with it. I've been asking my husband for more than a year to be in an open marriage and he always told me I was crazy. I asked him about intimacy and I always got the same answer, not tonight, I'm tired, I have a headache, the kids are still awake. You name the excuse I've heard it.

In December I made the choice without my husband's approval to seek a lover. Not knowing much about online dating I went to AM. There I found many men, mostly over the top strange men. I did a lot of blocking, saw tons of dick pics, and more. I happened to click on the picture of a guy who lived relatively close and had a simple profile similar to mine. We started to communicate and eventually met up for lunch one day in February. We had an instant connection. Since then we have become lovers. I am loving life and I am having the best sex ever. So thank you for the advice to have an affair. It has changed me for the better. I'm taking better care of myself, working out, losing weight, managing my depression, and I'm just happy. I've changed so much that my coworkers are noticing and I'm doing my job so much better. My husband hadn't noticed any changes. He oblivious. I stay for the kids since we get along pretty well with the exception of sex. With that being said on my birthday last month I approached my husband one more time. He said he would never be intimate again, he's not that into it, and I could do what I needed to do. I haven't shared the affair but maybe one day I will.

A Life Saved

Thanks for writing, ALS, and for providing an example of the kind of affair we rarely hear about: the one that saves a marriage and preserves someone's sanity. (This affair may have preserved the sanity of two someones; your husband is probably relieved you're not bothering him for sex anymore.) And I'm as pleased to hear you're happy as I am to hear you got retroactive permission from your husband to do what you were already doing anyway.

I am, however, shocked to hear that Ashley Madison is still up and running after, ahem, the recent unpleasantness. Here's hoping your letter, like so many accounts on Ashley Madison, isn't fake.

Vivamus dui velit, vehicula non sodales a, aliquet sit amet orci. In lorem nulla, porttitor a nibh ac, auctor sodales libero. Phasellus sit amet consectetur urna, sed congue neque. Mauris a commodo arcu, sed commodo libero. Nam vel orci sapien. Pellentesque ac magna hendrerit, efficitur purus dapibus, facilisis est. Maecenas tortor ante, lacinia eget ante vitae, aliquet interdum tortor. Suspendisse potenti. Morbi quis bibendum arcu.