Fuck you, CNN. Every morning, I turn on the cable network to get alternately outraged or bored by the latest campaign machinations, and this morning, I waited with anticipation to see what would happen when Donald Trump addressed the birther controversy.

I watched, for one-and-a-half hours, as the talking heads talked about what he might say, and went over his various forms of lying and flip-flopping, his many Tweets about the subject.

Then, they went to the event in Washington D.C., where approximately 1000 white men who've fought in all the wars stood up and talked about how war is good and Trump is awesome and we should vote a man who dodged the draft five times and was born with a multi-billion dollar spoon in his mouth. The Chyron kept promising that Trump was going to address the birther situation any minute. Anyyyyyy minute.

Finally, at the very last second of this interminably-dull event full of hubris and pomp and circumstance, Donald Trump stated a fact he has repeatedly denied was true—as recently as the night before. "President Barack Obama was born in the United States."

Then, he told a lie: “Hillary Clinton and her campaign of 2008 started the birther controversy,” Mr. Trump said. “I finished it.”

The talking heads were all baffled. "What!" "That's it!"

Fuck you, CNN. Fuck you for giving all this airtime to Donald Trump's non-statement, for giving airtime to a coward who ran away from the reporters who were going to grill him about his previous statements. He played you. He's played you (and the media) this entire election. You are one of the reasons we are in this predicament in the first place. Your on-air reporters might have been "shocked," but the producers should know better by now. You should know that Donald Trump is going to wait until the end of the event to say anything. Why did you give him and this stupid event all this airtime? Gee, I bet it has something to do with ratings.

In fact, they are still talking about the non story of Trump stating a fact that any sane human being understands to be true, now, two and a half hours later. Chyron: Trump Finally Admists Obama Was Born In U.S."

Oh, and while I'm at it, fuck you, too, Jimmy Fallon, for tussling Trump's hair like he's a golden retriever puppy and not a hateful bigot who is unqualified to be the president.

The media has been complicit in not applying the same standards to the two candidates. It your (our) fault. Hillary Clinton's health non-scandal (people get sick, it doesn't mean they are dying) ate up the media cycle. Now the polls are even. Happy now?

Meanwhile, Donald Trump tells a lie every time he opens his mouth. He still hasn't released his tax returns. He lied about why. He is a liar. Stop giving him non-stop airtime. Stop talking about what he is going to say, and talk about the fucked up things he has done. He has done more fucked up things than all the past Presidential Republican candidates in history combined.

If he is elected, it will be the media's (especially cable media's) burden to bear. But look on the bright side: four more years of fantastic ratings.