Look, I get it: You're in a rush. You're probably late for work, and your top priority is getting to the job on time and putting food on the table for your family. I love that go-getter attitude! BUT THIS PARKING? NONONONONONONONONO.

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This is the parking of a person who just robbed a bank. This is the parking of a person who wanted to actually park in the adjoining spot and then decided against it at the last second. This is the parking of a person who had a stroke and crawled off to a nearby ZoomCare.

And as bad as this attempt as parking is, it doesn't hold a candle to the following parking attempt in the same lot last week.

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This is the parking of a person who suffers from spatial disorientation (especially when it comes to judging what size of truck one should buy.) This is the parking of a person who doesn't realize a Car2Go is underneath his right rear tire. This is the parking of a person who thinks Trump may have a point.

Again, NONONONONONONONONO. (By the way, this is the blog post of a person who should probably ride his bike more often.)