Originally posted on March 5, 2014.

You always take questions from BDSMers and cuckolds and hardcore sexers, but will you take mine? Won't you please offer some advice to me, a simple heterosexual girl having problems with her heterosexual male?!? My boyfriend locks the door behind him when he pees. It hurts my feelings! Being a part of his pissing experience would turn me on! He claims he is pee shy. But he pees in public restrooms in front of other men! Why can't he pee in front of me?!? I would be grateful for your advice on how to get him to relax with his peeing moments a little more because I'm BORED. Thanks!

Personally Insulted Since Sexy Entrance Denied

My response after the jump...

You're just a simple heterosexual girl who wants to be part of her boyfriend's "pissing experience" because that would turn you on—nothing kinky or hardcore about that, no sir. You're just after some old-fashioned, all-American, plain-vanilla voyeuristic piss play.

I'm not sure there's anything I could say here that would persuade your boyfriend to include you in his pissing experience. If knowing that it would make his piss-freak girlfriend insanely horny doesn't motivate a guy to unlock the door and let her watch, PISSED, he's unlikely to be convinced by some gay dude with an advice column. (But just in case: Hey, PISSED's BF! Open the damn door!) So if watching your boyfriend piss is really that important to you, PISSED, you'll have to get a new boyfriend or start following the one you've got into public restrooms.