Here's another I, Anonymous Classic from the I, Anonymous archives!

They Provide Shopping Carts, You Know

I know you think you're being quaint by carting your big ass red wagon to the grocery store, but you're just being annoying. "We're so Portland!" you must think as you drag that thing around the store, blocking every aisle you walk down. You then blocked the whole express lane with your stupid Radio Flyer to pay for one bunch of carrots. That's it. You brought a giant red wagon to the store for a bunch of carrots. You know the store provides carts to hold your child and your groceries, right? Do that next time, because you look like the pill-head teacher from Magic School Bus walking down the street with your knee-high patchwork socks and your giant fucking red wagon filled with a 20 lb. child and one bunch of carrots. You. look. ridiculous.—Anonymous

Got a confession, rant, or just need to get something off your chest? The I, Anonymous Blog is perfect for that. Your submission might also wind up in the paper edition of the Mercury, or read aloud in the live I, Anonymous Show!