I've put up with the emergence of innumerable lame and ugly fashion fads politely and without comment. During the '90s, I withstood the widespread acceptance of ridiculous, overly long pants that dragged on the ground, and the resulting dirty mop tassel fringes (so stupid!). It apparently isn't terrible enough that we are a nation that has to officially grapple with the traumas of war. Oh no, now we also have to contend with the threat of these new blue jeans that come with doctored, bleached fronts and backs!! Who decided that looked good? It looks hideous!! It's reminiscent of the '80s acid-washed bleach spots, and I'm nauseated every time I see it. Please, for the world's sake, look in the mirror!! You look like a dumpster dive gone wrong. You blindly accept them as "in," but they're actually just factory rejects. YOU DO NOT LOOK HOT WITH A COUPLE OF WHITE STRIPES RUNNING DOWN THE FRONT OF YOUR LEGS AND OVER YOUR ASS. Jesus. Next thing I know, you people will be wearing gaucho pants.