Kalah Allen

McDonald's is a fucking scam. It's been three times in a row now that I've been to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal, and have either gotten no toy or a toy that was not advertised. This makes me so pissed off! See, today I was hungry but not super hungry, so I figured hey, why not get a moderately-sized Happy Meal? A simple pleasure that had been long overdue. McDonald's was advertising Happy Meal toys for girls and boys. Now, I have no use for some slutty looking Bratz doll, so naturally I ordered the boy toy, which was He-Man. I was so looking forward to my little overly packaged Chicken McNuggets, Fries, and He-Man doll. Isn't the whole point to get what you fucking expect? But when I went to reach for He-Man, he was nowhere to be found! The toy I did get was some goddamn fucking Inspector Gadget 2 toy. Damn McDonald's and their fucking false advertising!!!!! Because of this error, I was not able to enter my cardboard castle box using my toy to punch it open. Nor was I able to drive Skeletor back to Snake Mountain to get help. All because I had no He-Man to help me. Do the people making these Happy Meals have no heart? The least they could do was tell me that there were no more He-Man dolls. Did they actually think that some hard, yellow, plastic girl on a stand that lights up was really going to do the trick? Maybe they were just banking that I would drive off fast enough and not notice until later. Well, they were right! So I say McFuck You, because Happy Meals are no longer making me happy. --Anonymous