Rebecca Hahn
Swimmin' Hole No-No

If you went swimming at Blue Lake Park earlier this summer, chances are you have a wicked case of the runs. Did a flu bug cause your diarrhea? Afraid not. The reason everyone's getting sick is because someone shat in the water. The "Norwalk virus" is making a special appearance at a park near you, so bring the whole family, and make sure to swim with your mouth closed. A norovirus was detected in several swimmers who visited Blue Lake Park. A norovirus like the one found there cannot be treated with antibiotics and cannot grow on its own. It has to have a carrier. Can you guess a norovirus's favorite mode of transportation? If you guessed turds, you are correct! How did a norovirus show up at Blue Lake Park? Did someone consciously walk out into the water, drop their shorts, and poop? I think so! Just look at the facts: Blue Lake Park is right near Gresham. The people there take every opportunity to poop on or in anything. Blue Lake Park is just another victim. The park is re-opening to the public, and personally, I'm ready to swimÉ bowels loaded. --Anonymous