[From the editor: What follows is the fourth in a series of call & response letters from Joe Wallace (who loves Medeski Martin & Wood), and "Tinks" (who hates Joe Wallace as well as Medeski Martin & Wood).]
TO JOE WALLACE: Sorry, I can't let this go. Listen, pal. You've got a few things wrong.
#1. I'm a boy. "Tinks" is a shortened form of my surname.
#2. I know full well who Medeski Martin & Wood is. A "jazz" trio, as you say, but one who sucks, and who is listened to by pseudo-hippies and frat-boy types. You want Hammond jazz? Go find a record by Billy Larkin & the Delegates, Big John Patton, Brother Jack McDuff, Richard "Groove" Holmes, Shirley Scott or Charles Earland. That is jazz. Not this watered-down sorry-ass white boy fusion shit.
And what's this "they play music that makes this a better world" bullshit? You proved my original point right there, you stupid hippie. Maybe you haven't noticed it, but the reason the show sold out is because there are a lot of Portlanders who have no taste.
HIPPIES CAN'T TAKE A JOKE, PART I
TO THE EDITOR: Where does Ann Romano get off saying Hippies can't take a joke ["One Day at a Time," April 26]? I've been a Hippie as long as I can remember, and probably before she was born, and I can take a frickin' joke.
And think about Ralph's candidacy: what better joke than the intimate view he provided us of "democracy" in Florida? The Demopublicans and Republicrats are full of humor themselves since they want the destitute people of India, for instance, to cut back their fossil fuel use before we agree to reduce ours--even though we produce 22 times as much CO2 per capita.
Wake up and smell the humor, smart-ass Romano, cause the joke's on all of us.
HIPPIES CAN'T TAKE A JOKE, PART II
TO ANN ROMANO: You silly little twit. Ann Romano says Portland's May Day parade was boring ["One Day at a Time," May 10]. Contrary to what the mass media (and other, littler, less powerful organs of "people" like yourselves) thinks, demonstrations are intended to INFORM people about a particular issue. The May Day parade was not organized to provide you with exciting stories of police brutality or protestor stupidity. It was organized to a) celebrate the advance of worker rights in the past 150 years, and b) to draw attention to working conditions around the world that still need improvement. The fact that there was no violence was INTENTIONAL on the part of the marchers, and the police are to be (cautiously) praised for their mature handling of the affair. Only a cynical boob like you would claim that a huge, vibrant, successful march was boring.
ANTI-POSTER BAN STICKS IT TO ARTISTS!
TO THE EDITOR: Here's an open letter to Hugh McDowell, Graffiti Prevention Coordinator for the City of Portland ["Pining for Posters," News, May 10].
Dear Mr. McDowell: As an artist, community member and organizer, frequent phone-pole flier reader and even an infrequent flier hanger, I'd like a minute to talk to you about the ban on telephone pole fliering you are considering. One of the aspects of Portland that makes it a unique city is its music and arts scene. As one of the most livable and still-affordable large cities on the West Coast, Portland remains a magnet for young, aspiring artists, craftspeople and bands from across the country.
While some well-publicized opportunities, such as Saturday Market, exist for local artists to share their work, the majority labor in obscurity. Often, a flier on a telephone pole is one of the few channels that musicians and other artists (not to mention community organizers) have to communicate their message or promote their work in a public forum. And this will continue to be the case until the Rose Quarter sponsors a New Band Night, the Portland Art Museum allows living, breathing artists through their doors more often than every two years, the Oregonian covers progressive political rallies without the threat of a riot, and Channel Two hosts a Prime Time Open Mike for spoken-word artists.
We've already seen a recent trend towards replacing public art with corporate advertising here in Portland. Let's not kick coffin nails into the chances of underground artists and organizers actually being seen and heard.