Frank, why don't you get your lazy bitch ass up and walk your fat-fuck imbecile self over to the fucking mashed potatoes? Are you so fucking lazy we have to do ALL the work for you? Should we serve them up onto your plate for you too? Cut up your turkey and spoon feed it to you? Are you an incapable baby? Do you want us to wipe your ass for you after you take a shit next, too, you fat fucktard? - Grandma Cassano, 95

I can't believe some people think there's really a Frank Cassano, when it's clear to anyone with a brain that he died of a coronary in 2005 when his Penthouse stock collapsed in value.