Am I In Danger of Termination?

Unemployment continues to rise as the technology sector falters and the economy slows. Is a depression looming on the horizon? Is the market preparing to crash? Is the U.S. near the end of its rein as a super power? More importantly, how will all this affect YOU? Want to know if you have a pink slip in your future? Take this simple true/false quiz and find out. Good luck!


T F I was going to put that money back in petty cash. I swear.
T F
I passed my boss in the office yesterday, and she burst into tears.
T F I made 17 copies of my homoerotic Star Trek fan fiction and accidentally left the original on the copier at work.
T F
Monster.com is my homepage.
T F
I'm still not sure why we can't play interoffice spin-the-bottle.
T F My company sold my task chair.
T F
I believe that it is legitimate to expense speeding tickets and hot air balloon rides.
T F
My boss is my ex-girlfriend/boyfriend.
T F
I am an art teacher.
T F
I work for the PR agency that represents Firestone Tires.
T F
I work for a company with the word "dot" in the name.
T F
I wear hot pants to my job at the bank.
T F
They changed the locks on my office door.
T F
I work in an industry that doesn't have a product.
T F
They made me turn in my cell phone.
T F
I lost the company van.
T F
My stock options are worth less than my keyboard.
T F
I believe that e-solutions are the key to e-business globalization and an egalitarian utopia.
T F
Just a few more workdays, and I'll be done with my screenplay!
T F "Profitability" is just a state of mind.

Did you answer "true" to ten or more of the above? You will most likely be fired in the next eight to ten business days. Begin smuggling out proprietary software immediately, and erase all emails from your hard drive, especially the ones from your brother. The unemployed get along well with writers, alcoholics, night owls, and ventriloquists. They are disliked by actresses.