*May or may not be today. Why wouldn't it be?

Last week, I was enjoying the grease-laden early-mid-afternoon meal that can only be found at My Father's Place. They have one of those digital jukeboxes that's stocked with lots of classic rock and obnoxious pop, and as I was sipping on my bloody mary, my friend got up and left me alone at the table to be assaulted, completely unprepared, by this song:


I'm not gonna lie, I cried a little bit. How can you NOT resonate with this sentiment: "I want you! I need you! But no way in hell am I ever gonna love you..." (if you can't, then I want your life).

I watched this video at the next opportunity, and was newly curious about the man beyond the Meat Loaf myth. Just look at him—the outrageous outfit, obscenely long hair and double chin(s). The way he unabashedly strokes his chest and tugs at his collar. Who are these people he's singing about?! I would be very interested to meet the "only girl he's ever gonna love," as well as the desperado that he's turning down for all five minutes of this song. To have been entangled in such intrigues with Meat Loaf would require that they be characters of his caliber, and wouldn't THAT be a sight to see.

I guess we could consider the distant possibility that Meat Loaf's songs are not literal retelling of his life's events. BUT I DON'T WANT TO! I find Meat Loaf's very appeal to be that even though he's so weird and conventionally unattractive, he still manages to have such scandalous, lusty affairs as described in "I Would Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That)" and "Paradise by the Dashboard Light."

All of this makes me realize that I don't want to live in a world where Meat Loaf is anything less than a grandiose sex god. And if it's all for show, well then well-played, Mr. Loaf. Keep on tellin' 'em: "I want you. I need you...."