Just when you thought it was safe to celebrate, here's the inimitable King Diamond with a lump of coal for you! Like a lot of true '80s metal, "No Presents for Christmas" manages to be extremely silly and kind of genuinely sinister. What else would you expect from the King?

PS, I love how, halfway through the making of this fan video, YouTube user flyingpigzjacob apparently ran out of pictures of Santa with skeleton arms and smoking blunts so he decided to include a jpg of Huey, Dewey and Louie excited to open a stack of gifts. Didn't you hear King Diamond, you stupid ducks? No presents for Christmas!