THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 16
8:00 CW SMALLVILLE
Clark battles a monster who sucks the bones out of people. They'll figure out a way to make that sexy.
8:30 NBC THE OFFICE
After the Scranton and Stamford offices merge, Pam and Jim are reunited! SOB! This is the happiest day of my life!
FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 17
8:30 TOON TONY HAWK IN BOOM BOOM SABOTAGE
A gang of kids rescue skateboarding god Tony Hawk from an evil circus ringmaster. AWESOME!
9:00 SCI BATTLESTAR GALACTICA
A pilot captured by the Cylons returns to the Galactica—and no, I don't trust him either.
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 18
8:00 NBC DATELINE NBC
Hooray! Another Dateline show devoted to catching internet predators, and... wait... DAD! What are you doing there?!?
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 19
10:00 VH1 CELEBRITY PARANORMAL PROJECT
Comedian(?) Gilbert Gottfried investigates a haunted asylum and annoys the shit out of some spirits.
1:00 am TOON THE VENTURE BROTHERS
Team Venture joins the ghost of Abe Lincoln in order to solve a groovy mystery!
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 20
8:00 ABC PEANUTS DOUBLE FEATURE
It's A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving followed by the ultra-violent grindhouse feature, He's a Bully, Charlie Brown.
10:00 NBC STUDIO 60 ON THE SUNSET STRIP
This abysmally annoying show has been picked up for another season, proving once again there is no God.
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 21
8:00 NBC TONY BENNETT: AN AMERICAN CLASSIC
The awesome Tony sings duets with Barbra Streisand, Elton John, Stevie Wonder, and a few other kids under the age of 85.
9:00 CW VERONICA MARS
When a sorority girl is kidnapped, it takes two years for anyone to give a crap.
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 22
8:00 NBC MADONNA: THE CONFESSIONS TOUR
This live concert from London will be great—if you don't mind imagining your aunt masturbating.
8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL
During a photo shoot, the models are chased around by an angry bull. Another reason why there is a God.