THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 11

8:00 FOX HOLE IN THE WALL

Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! Holes! HOLES!

11:00 VH1 THE CHO SHOW

Margaret Cho and a family member star in poignant video entitled, "Two Cho's, One Cup." Waitasecond...

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 12

9:00 FOX DON'T FORGET THE LYRICS

Season premiere! A roller derby queen forgets the lyrics and elbows Wayne Brady in the scrabble bag.

9:00 USA MONK

Season finale! Monk gets hypnotized and reverts to his nine-year-old personality (which is only slightly more sane).

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 13

8:00 FOX COPS

Hilarity ensues in this episode about extremely stupid criminal behavior (because as we know, cops NEVER do ANYTHING stupid).

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 14

9:00 DSC SECRETS OF THE DINOSAUR MUMMY

WTF? A dinosaur mummy?? Oh, hell no! I'm outta here!!

10:00 AMC MAD MEN

Father Gill tries to get Peggy to "volunteer" to work on his church "project." (I believe it's the one in his pants.)

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 15

8:00 CW GOSSIP GIRL

Luckily, an earthquake traps Serena and Dan in an elevator together. Unluckily, a lot of other people die.

10:00 MTV THE HILLS

Lo asks Lauren is she's like, into this new guy, and Lauren is all like, wow, I dunno, and sits there looking pensive.

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16

8:00 ABC WIPEOUT

Season finale! The hosts try to run the obstacle course! HA! Not so easy is it?

8:00 CW 90210

Kelly and Brenda get in an argument over Ryan. Punch her in her stupid blonde face, Brenda!!

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 17

8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL

Tyra forces the girls to get makeovers, causing freakouts of epic proportions.

9:00 BRAVO PROJECT RUNWAY

The designers create fashions for college gals transitioning from drunks to businesswomen.