Thursday,

January 11

9:00 NBC WILL & GRACE

Will and Grace somehow get it into their thick skulls that buying Sandra Bernhard's townhouse is a good idea.

9:30 WB GILMORE GIRLS

Lorelai decides to break up with Rory's teacher at a PTA meeting. Wow! What a bad idea!


Friday, January 12

9:00 WB POPSTARS

Kind of like Making the Band, except it's for the pre-menstrual set.

9:00 UPN CHEATING SPOUSES CAUGHT ON TAPE

No-good hubbies get caught sticking their wild baloney ponies into other people's stables.


Saturday, January 13

8:00 ABC THE FIFTH ELEMENT--Movie

(1997) Bruce Willis sets out to save the universe by rescuing an interstellar hottie dressed only in Band-Aids.

8:00 AMC HEAD--Movie

(1968) The Monkees star in this marijuana freak-out flick directed by... (BOING!!) Jack Nicholson?!?


Sunday, January 14

8:30 WB THE PJs

Thurgood enters the 21st century by installing a new space-age toilet.

10:00 ABC THE PRACTICE

Dumb Bobby gets tossed in the pokey for conspiring to kill William Hinks! HA! HA! HA!


Monday, January 15

8:00 TV LAND CHARLIE'S ANGELS

The Angels cross over onto The Love Boat to capture and stop a new strain of gonorrhea.

9:00 FOX ALLY McBEAL

Robert Downey Jr.'s ex-wife makes another surprise visit (probably just to give him a ride to rehab).


Tuesday, January 16

8:00 ABC THE MOLE

A new reality show dedicated to Cindy Crawford's birthmark.

9:00 WB ANGEL

Hottie vampires Darla and Drusilla take over L.A., and it's up to Angel to get them modeling assignments.


Wednesday, January 17

9:00 FOX TEMPTATION ISLAND

A reality show that's sort of like Treasure Island, except with a lot more penises and vaginas.