Thursday, January 18

8:00 WB GILMORE GIRLS

Lorelai plays matchmaker, thereby sending more innocent lives into the crapper.

8:00 TV LAND CHARLIE'S ANGELS

A goddam drug addict ships Kelly off to the Land of Nod by slipping her heroin!


Friday, January 19

8:00 UPN GARY & MIKE

At a Phish concert, Gary accidentally takes drugs and marries a stinking hippie.

8:30 WB POPSTARS

A hundred more teenage gals get their hearts smashed by the callous entertainment industry. Whoopee!


Saturday, January 20

7:00 AMC TOMMY--Movie

(1975) A physically challenged kid excels in the pinball arts in the Who's classic rock opera.

8:30 NBC DEMOLITION MAN--Movie

(1993) It's the year 2032, and Sly Stallone travels to the future just to kick Wesley Snipes' ass!


Sunday, January 21

7:00 ABC WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY--Movie

(1971) Gene Wilder stars as the owner of a confection factory who systematically murders children with the help of Oompa Loompas.


Monday, January 22

8:00 FOX BOSTON PUBLIC

Libidos get pumpin' when the cheerleading team dreams up a sexy new routine! Rrrrroowwrr!

9:00 FOX ALLY McBEAL

Chubby Checker emcees a twist contest in the bar, which is a fairly good indication that this show is going to blow.


Tuesday, January 23

8:00 WB BUFFY, THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

The Watchers visit with info about Glory, but are less than willing to help. Oooh! I hate those stoopid limeys!

10:00 ABC NYPD BLUE

Danny's concerned about Diane, Fancy is concerned about Medavoy, Katie is concerned about Andy, and I'm concerned about being BORED TO DEATH!


Wednesday, January 24

9:00 NBC WEST WING

Bartlet exhibits signs of having something in common with Bush when he appoints a drunkard to an ambassador position.