Thursday, April 4

8:00 OXY HYPE!--Movie

(1996) Travel back to the thrilling days of flannel and superfluous ski caps with this documentary about the Seattle grunge scene.

10:00 NBC E.R.

Dr. Greene's brain tumor makes him lose muscle coordination (which probably isn't as funny as it sounds).

Friday, April 5

8:00 CBS AFP: AMERICAN FIGHTER PILOT

On the first day of Top Gun flight school, the recruits have an underpants modeling competition.

8:00 MTV THE OSBOURNES

Two back-to-back episodes in which Ozzy prepares for his tour and battles with non-Satanic neighbors.

Saturday, April 6

9:00 ABC ROMY AND MICHELE'S HIGH SCHOOL REUNION--Movie

(1997) Mira Sorvino and Lisa Kudrow as two dingbat losers with a surefire plan to get revenge on their high school.

9:00 AMC COUNT YORGA, VAMPIRE--Movie

(1970) Yorga gets his blood-suckin' groove on in this hippie-filled retelling of Dracula.

Sunday, April 7

8:00 A&E SHACKLETON--Movie

(2002) Limey Kenneth Branagh as the famous explorer who goes to Antarctica and gets caught ass-deep in ice!

9:00 ABC ALIAS

Sydney is on a secret mission and runs into an old ex-boyfriend (who accuses her of stealing all of his Duran Duran records).

Monday, April 8

9:00 ABC THE BACHELOR

A new game show in which sixteen women humiliate themselves to impress one single meathead.

Tuesday, April 9

9:00 COM THE SWEET SPOT

Bill Murray and his family compete against each other and exchange smacktalk in an annual golf tournament.

10:00 FX THE SHIELD

Vic responds to the news of his child being autistic by beating the shit out of an Armenian drug gang.

Wednesday, April 10

9:30 WB FELICITY

When school gets tough, Felicity decides to do what the rest of us have been doing for years--CHEAT.