Thursday, December 12
8:30 NBC SCRUBS
Cox tries to ease Jordan's discomfort with a nice, warm enema.

9:00 NBC WILL & GRACE
Will and Jack compete for the lofty title of "Gayest Gay since Gaylord McGayerson moved to Gay Town, U.S.GAY."

Friday, December 13

8:00 UPN STAR TREK IV: THE VOYAGE HOME--Movie
Kirk and the gang travel back in time to Earth circa 1988 to battle humpback whales and acid wash jeans.

9:00 FOX JOHN DOE
Doe gets a hint about his true identity when a collection agency informs him he's defaulted on his student loans.

Saturday, December 14

9:30 am UPN SHERLOCK HOLMES IN THE 22ND CENTURY
In this cartoon version of the Arthur Conan Doyle character, Holmes travels far into the future to score more opium.

8:00 FX L.A. CONFIDENTIAL--Movie
1997 kick-ass crime thriller starring Russell Crowe, before everyone thought he was the biggest prick in the Western Hemisphere.

Sunday, December 15
8:30 E! THE ANNA NICOLE SHOW
Anna and her friends attack one another in a game of paintball!

9:00 NBC NATIONAL LAMPOON'S CHRISTMAS VACATION--Movie
The sexual tension between Chevy Chase and Randy Quaid is so thick you can cut it with a knife in this hilarious holiday classic.

Monday, December 16
8:00 NBC FEAR FACTOR
Contestants are dared to stand on their heads in a bucket of donkey guts--and some of them even like it.

Tuesday, December 17
8:00 CBS JAG
The team is sad because they can't celebrate Christmas at Bud and Harriet's place, so they go bust some more military criminals.

9:00 FOX 24
Jack takes a break from saving L.A. from nuclear annihilation to wash that skanky shirt he's wearing.

Wednesday, December 18
8:00 WB DAWSON'S CRACK
After years of indecision, Dawson finally asks Pacey the question we've all been waiting to hear: "So... why'd your parents give you a chick's name?"

8:00 A&E THE MANSON WOMEN--Biography
Hippie girls give unswerving loyalty to their crazed guru, Charles Manson.