yeah, you ride a bike and wear these super skin tight pants, and you don't wear any underwear as evidenced by the bulge and every shape therein being hugged by the thin cotton of your ladies exercise pants. I see you at least once a week in front of the starbucks sipping away at your beverage.

Dude, super inappropriate. I'm a pretty open minded guy and it makes me feel uncomfortable, I can only imagine the banter from the almost all female staff at the coffee place. I don't know if you're slow, a pervert, or just very proud of your mushroom head, but I keep waiting for someone to box your nuts. I will be the laughing guy with the iced coffee standing to the side.