I've gained a massive amount of weight since you left me. I eat like crap, drink like a fish and have given up on all my daily health routines. I'm living in a fluid state of dispair and gluttony. Too much food, too many drugs, too much drink. My burps sound like vomiting. My farts smell like hell. I'm a complete and utter mess.

I've wallowed in this filth for 6 months now and see no light at the end of the tunnel. I miss our time together, our talks, making dinner, making love. We adopted a puppy and you let me keep him after we broke up. He now sits in a corner of the living room with the soft glow of the TV on his sad little face. Daddy can't move except to refill his drink or to take a shit. I don't walk him. I don't pet him. I don't even talk to him anymore.

I can't believe I've fallen so far in such a short amount of time. I'm in the gutter with the filthy street water washing away my tears. The pigeons and rats don't even walk around me, they walk over me while giving condescending stares and judgmental sighs.

It would probably be worse if I had to work. Luckily I inherited a lot of money when I was younger and do not have to work for the rest of my life. The money doesn't help much in the way of making me happy, but it does provide me the luxury of marinating in my own juices indefinitely. Maybe I'll take a trip to sit on some warm tropical beach…that might help my mood. I'm so sad.