I unabashedly and wholeheartedly admit my adoration for your brilliant intellect, insightful wit, and uplifting attitude. You are a champion of truth, and a shining beacon of intestinal fortitude. A light house standing proud on the shores of this diarrhea filth of a nation. It is an honor, good sir, to read the wisdom you so freely wash over us. I raise my glass and say Viva La Cassano. Live long and prosper F-uh-raaank!
The views expressed in these submissions are from anonymous, unverified sources and do not necessarily represent those of the Portland Mercury.