What haven't I eliminated from the spectrum of things that I can experience in my life?
I will most likely never set foot on Mt. Midoriyama for even stage one of the ninja warrior course.
I have limited interactions with my closest friends.
I will not ask for help. If I do, I will do it wrong and probably ask the wrong person.
I will blame myself as much as possible, knowing that I am the only thing I can control.
I deserve the hate that I receive. No amount of good deeds, hard work, isolation, counseling, apologies, money (not that i have any), or anything else will make me human again.
The worst part is meeting new people that I genuinely appreciate and respect, knowing that they will never accept me.
I'm not sure what my goals are.
Comedy was a thing that gave me strength when my life was extra dark. I wanted to be a part of it so bad.
I'm not sure how much I want to participate in this culture or if I do at all.
You're all doing great. I have been fortunate enough to get out a few times in the last decade and I really enjoyed your work.
But I keep hearing the phrases that say I'm not allowed.
Un coche verde. The noun comes first.
You are winning.
I no longer work for your acceptance or approval. We will most likely never be friends.
I work to find the quiet shitty hole to hide in. I'll blend in long enough to clock in and clock out. Eventually I'll work hard enough to disappear forever. Because that is what you asked for.

Sorry for existing

Sincerely,

A long time fan of comedy