I don't know what that was about that one day.
Number one, I was standing near a corner, waiting for a friend. A cute girl in a car at the stop sign threw me her smile. I just nodded.
Number two, same corner, still waiting for a friend. Another cute girl came out of nowhere behind me with information on Jesus or religion. I was cold to her and told her to keep it. I've been cold to the world and people lately. But I should've just taken it. I should've engaged with her. Talked to her. I don't care if it was about Jesus. Instead I brushed her off so unfriendly, which is not me but what I've become, yet want to get back to the guy I used to be. Why in the world would she have taken the time to pull over, stop, and get out of her car to recruit me for whatever reason if there wasn't something more to it?
Number three, walking past another cute girl in her car, she threw me a smile. I nodded dimly again.
Why? This isn't normal. Normal is all these stern, broken, smug, worried, isolated, lost in your own world faces I see a thousand times a day. I need to pay attention. I need to see past what I normally see. I need to be open. These thousand blank faces make the smiling, reassuring ones drown. I need to smile more too. I need to find something to get happy about.