As a Portland native, I am sick of the xenophobic bullshit people are passing off as “Keeping Portland Weird” in this town. Replace “Californian” with “Mexican,” or “Jews,” or “Blacks,” on those “No Californians allowed” signs and you’ll hopefully feel a little bit gross about yourself.

If no one moved to Portland, you’d be stuck with the people already in Portland. Do you really want to go through life where the only casual encounters you have are with people who either went to your high school or played your high school in a competitive sport?

We should all relish the possibility of not running into a former classmate at the gym.

I mean… If no one moved to Portland, who would all the former-cool-kid-stoners-turned-real-estate-agents you graduated from high school with sell houses to?