I'd like to be a more positive person. Someone who treats people with kindness and respect. Maybe even makes their day a little better.
Most the time, I lack the ability to take care of myself. I'm sorry I haven't done more to help or that when you see me, I don't appear friendly.
I've been pretty depressed about having no money, no friends, and no life. If I didn't paint a smile on and pretend to be jovial around you, I guess I wasn't doing my job. If I tried to set a personal boundary, I guess that was me thinking I was human or something. That was rude of me and I'm sorry.
I did set up an appointment for a mental health eval last year. Shortly after, I applied for what I know now was a pyramid scheme. My roommate kicked me out because I was behind on rent. I ended up staying in a friend's shed. I did not end up keeping my mental health appointment.
I guess more important though, is that I have bills and other things I have to pay for. And I'm an asshole. It will take me a while. I can barely afford rent, gas, and food.
Oh well. Back in the machine.
Trying to stay positive