Marjorie was called back to the past this week to kill John Connor so you're stuck with me. First let me reassure you that, though I can't dress myself, I can judge other people's work just as harshly as the next art school pantywaist. Let me then dash your reassurances by saying that it's a hell of a week to be on my own. Those of you watching at the Tanker last night know what I'm talking about. Between the Blazers game ending at 10:20 only to be followed by a really noisy raffle for Engineers Without Borders it was pretty much impossible to hear anything going on at Parsons. So let's try and piece together what happened starting with Portland's adopted son and cat-tailor, Seth Aaron.
The challenge this week was to create and use your own fabric. This was a neat idea because instead of inhibiting the designers per usual it actually gave them more rope and set them free to hang themselves. Seth went with what appears to be a child's drawing of a sexy cyclops and turned it into a jacket. Uh... ok.
Like Tim, I was relieved that the print was as small as it is. From a distance you almost can't tell what it is (disguising the fact that, up close, you still can't tell what it is).
Hey look, zippers and studs! Where'd those come from? Oh I know, he must have borrowed them from EVERY OTHER OUTFIT HE'S EVER MADE. Mark my words, one of these days Seth Aaron is going to turn in an outfit made of one giant stud with zippers all over it. In Seth's carefully chosen words, those pants are "1940s military... a little German influence," to which Tim unsmilingly replied, "Heidi will like it." Ha!
The winners and losers after the jump!
Let's talk about Jonathan. I've already picked Seth as the winner because he tempers his "original style" (read: Hot Topic for grownups) with really beautiful tailoring. But what does Jonathan have going for him? He and Anthony have been sort of hanging on by their fingernails by both being kind of mediocre. Anthony had a clear advantage in my mind because he's sassy and classy (rivaling only Jay McCarroll as a worthy PR friend-crush). When Jonathan gets a chance on camera he quips it up but they all fall pretty flat. And we all know that the PR winners are, in part, picked by the show's producers (it says so before the credits) so I thought Anthony was gonna stick around a little longer.
This assumption was bolstered by the fact that the judges were lukewarm at his judging but admitted his look had potential. Jonathan, on the other hand, they hate hate hated. Compare:
Yikes! Michael Kors likens it to a "disco straightjacket" and "dirty tablecloth," while Nina is overcome with emotion: "The emotion I feel is sadness. I feel sad!" Then Kors calls Jono out for ego-trippin'! This is an instance where I can't argue with the pot calling the kettle black (or the ass calling the other ass a bigger, smellier ass). Having Michael Kors say your ego is too large is pretty shameful.
- "I feel sad!"
But, for whatever reason, it's Anthony we say goodbye to and Jonathan hangs on for one more week. Keep those quips coming, Jonathan! You've got one more week to be Santino!
On the other end of things, the judges liked Emilio's grafitti/French new wave print:
I thought it was kinda ugly, but I wasn't that taken with any of the other looks, either. Jay's was alright, but the turtleneck was a bit much, I think; Mila's out there color-blocking again (boring!); Maya's was inoffensive... Despite all my bitching, I think the best all-around look belonged to (gasp) Seth Aaron. You don't have to like your pony to bet on it, folks. And if I were you, I'd be betting on it.