My Little Pony: The Movie

2017 | 104 minutes | Rated PG

Hasbro is a giant company that makes toys for children. One of their most popular are the Transformers. In 2007 a bad man named Michael Bay was put in charge of making movies about the Transformers, and he’s since dedicated his entire life to summoning forth an ever-swirling hurricane of cinematic dogshit that—even at its friendliest—is 100% inappropriate for the kids these increasingly ugly fucking toys are (ostensibly) manufactured for. Somehow, Hasbro’s other major property, My Little Pony, has escaped such a hell. Sure, there was that weird “Brony” thing from a couple years ago, but that’s mostly dead now. This movie is just a simple animated film about magical multicolored talking horsies. That’s it. There won’t be any decapitations, dismemberments, pissing, robo-testicles, or laminated cards promoting statutory rape anywhere in the film. Just singing cartoon ponies. And rainbows. That’s it. Promise.

Thursday 10/12

Downtown

Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison
844-462-7342
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Thurs 1:30 pm, 4:30 pm, 7:30 pm, 10:10 pm

Southeast

Thurs 11 am, 1:45 pm, 4:30 pm, 7:15 pm, 10 pm

Division Street

16603 SE Division
844-462-7342
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Thurs 11:40 am, 2:15 pm, 4:50 pm, 7:30 pm

Elsewhere

Bridgeport Village Stadium 18

7329 SW Bridgeport Rd., Tigard
844-462-7342
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Thurs 12:35 pm, 3:15 pm, 6 pm, 8:35 pm

Century 16 Cedar Hills Crossing

3200 SW Hocken, Beaverton
800-326-3264
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Thurs 11:15 am, 1:50 pm, 4:25 pm, 7 pm, 9:35 pm

Thurs 10:50 am, 1:35 pm, 4:20 pm, 7:05 pm, 9:50 pm

Thurs 11:25 am, 2:10 pm, 5 pm, 7:55 pm, 9:10 pm

Cinetopia Progress Ridge 14

12345 SW Horizon Blvd
597-6900
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Thurs 11:40 am, 2:30 pm, 5:20 pm, 8 pm, 9:20 pm

Cinetopia Vancouver Mall 23

8700 NE Vancouver Mall Dr.
360-448-4100
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Thurs 11 am, 2:30 pm, 6:20 pm, 9:20 pm

City Center 12

801 C Street, Vancouver
844-462-7342
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Thurs 11:40 am, 2:50 pm, 5:40 pm, 8:15 pm

Evergreen Parkway 13

185th & Evergreen Pkwy., Hillsboro
844-462-7342
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Thurs 11:45 am, 2:30 pm, 5:15 pm, 8 pm, 10:40 pm

Hilltop 9

325 Beavercreek Road
844-462-7342
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Thurs 11:15 am, 2 pm, 4:45 pm, 7:30 pm, 10:15 pm

Movies on TV Stadium 16

TV Highway at 234th, Hillsboro
800-326-3264
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Thurs 11:45 am, 2:15 pm, 4:45 pm, 7:15 pm, 9:45 pm

Oak Grove 8 Cinemas

16100 SE McLoughlin Blvd.
653-9999
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Thurs 2:15 pm, 4:40 pm, 7:05 pm

Regal Cascade Stadium 16 Cinemas

1101 SE 160th Ave
844-462-7342
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Thurs 12 pm, 2:40 pm, 5:20 pm, 8 pm, 10:40 pm

Regal Cinema 99 Stadium 11

9010 N.E. Highway 99
844-462-7342
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Thurs 12:30 pm, 3:45 pm, 7 pm, 10:15 pm

Sherwood 10

15995 Tualatin Sherwood Road, Sherwood
844-462-7342
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Thurs 12 pm, 3:50 pm, 6:50 pm

Stark Street Cinemas

2929 NE Kane, Gresham
844-462-7342
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Thurs 1:25 pm, 4:10 pm, 6:50 pm, 9:25 pm

Wilsonville Town Center 9

29300 SW Town Center Loop, Wilsonville
844-462-7342
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Thurs 1 pm, 3:50 pm, 7 pm, 9:40 pm

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Film Credits
Director
Jayson Thiessen
Cast
Emily Blunt, Kristin Chenoweth, Liev Schreiber, Michael Peña, Sia, Taye Diggs, Uzo Aduba, Zoe Saldana, Ashleigh Ball, Andrea Libman, Tabitha St. Germain, Tara Strong, Cathy Weseluck