Finally! A real reason to recall the Multnomah County Commissioners! Last week, in an Alzheimer-like lapse of memory, the otherwise progressive and often wise-minded county commissioners declared June 11, 2004 as "Day of Mourning in Remembrance of Ronald Reagan." By unanimous consent, the commissioners adopted a resolution glossing over much of the ickier portions of the Reagan legacy, presenting the oily haired president as holier than the pope. (The resolution is reprinted below.) To mark the day, the Mercury adopted its own resolution commemorating Reagan's life and legacy, also reprinted in full below.

From the office of county commissioner Lisa Naito:

PROCLAMATION NO. 04-075

Proclaiming June 11, 2004 a Day of Mourning in Remembrance of Ronald Reagan, Fortieth President of the United States of America.

The Multnomah County Board of Commissioners Finds:

a. Ronald Reagan was a great American and a great patriot.

b. As president, Ronald Reagan served our country with vision, optimism and good humor.

c. President Reagan will be remembered in history for many significant achievements--most notably, his diligent efforts that ended the Cold War.

d. President Reagan, in a time of economic recession, succeeded in building support for our Armed Forces.

e. In an historic step for the women's rights movement, President Reagan nominated Sandra Day O'Connor in 1981 to become the first woman to serve on the United States Supreme Court.

f. In Oregon, President Reagan will be remembered for signing into law an Act creating the 292,500 acre Columbia River Gorge National Scenic Area in 1986.

The Multnomah County Board of Commissioners Proclaims:

1. June 11, 2004 a Day of Mourning in remembrance of President Ronald Reagan, who died June 5, 2004.

2. That the flag of the United States be displayed at half-staff at all County buildings for a period of 30 days from the time of his death.

3. The Board of County Commissioners invites the people of Multnomah County to join in a moment of silence at 12:00 noon on Friday June 11, 2004 as an expression of public sorrow.

ADOPTED this 10th of June, 2004.

MERCURY PROCLAMATION NO. 04-007

ADOPTED this 11th of June, 2004, the Portland Mercury finds: a. Ronald Reagan instigated the "decade of greed" by borrowing from the future (e.g., our present) to bring temporary sunshine to the rich in exchange for decades of doom and gloom.

b. President Reagan will be remembered for "tearing down" the Berlin Wall, the result of an audacious foreign policy of bullying and taunting United Nations members--a situation that could have just as easily ended with nuclear warfare.

c. The policies of "the Great Communicator" planted the seeds for global terrorism abroad and rampant homelessness here in the United States;

1. By trading arms with Iranian terrorists, and with the CIA's support and training of an Islamic jihad in Afghanistan against the Soviets in the 1980s (subsequently abandoning Osama bin Laden like a used tissue), the Reagan Administration created a well trained network of Islamic extremists;

2. By halving the federal budget for HUD and eviscerating "commitment laws" for mental health services, Reagan increased the burgeoning homeless population more than anyone in American history.

d. President Reagan, in a time of economic recession, built support for our Armed Forces by okaying rampant overcharges by the Pentagon and by secretly spending (without Congressional authorization) $22 billion on development of B-2 bombers--all at the expense of social services, education, and arts programs.

e. In an historic step toward stacking the Supreme Court with rabidly conservative justices, Reagan appointed Sandra Day O'Connor (who has supported laws that curb access to abortions), as well as Chief Justice William Rehnquist (who punched holes in civil rights laws), and Antonin Scalia (who must hide his devil horns each time he's in public).

f. Reagan will be remembered for thinking toward the future, such as pushing for oil drilling in ecologically sensitive areas like the Arctic wilderness.

g. When it comes to workers' rights, Reagan took a tip from the union busters in the Carolina coal mines and corporate farmers who exploit migrant workers, by firing every single striking air traffic controller.

The Mercury Proclaims:

1. June 11, 2004 as a "Day of True Remembrance of President Ronald Reagan," and invites the people of Multnomah County to join in a moment of silence as an expression of public sorrow for everyone who has been the victim of Reagan's bright and shining "legacy."

by Phil Busse