This is the story of not one but two men: One who's looking for love, and one who's helping him find it.
THE LOVE DOCTOR
On a typically sunny day in Los Angeles, pre-2000, David Wygant found himself sitting at a table in the Coffee Bean with five men--each of whom was making at least $300,000 per year.
"Studio executives. Talent agents. High-power men," reflects Wygant. "And I said I was going to Whole Foods to get something to eat."
Wygant had been recruited by the men, in light of recent success as a dating advisor on local radio talk shows, to give them more detailed tips on romance, up close and personal. As he rose to get his lunch, the men rose with him, demanding to accompany him to the grocery store and view his alleged flirtation skills in action. The pressure was on; a gang of L.A. alpha males wanted Wygant to practice what he preached.
"So I took all these guys to Whole Foods," he continues, "and they literally took notes. I showed them how nonchalant flirting can be. There was a woman named Lucy at the deli counter who liked me and used to make me ahi wraps. I was standing there and I said, 'Hey Lucy, I'll take my famous ahi wrap.' And this girl in line turned around and looked at me and I looked at her and said, 'Have you tried one of my famous ahi wraps?' and she said 'No, I was getting a turkey sandwich,' and I said 'Oh, my ahi wrap is great,' and the next thing you know, we're talking about expanding horizons, and what we wanted to do in our lives, and if we liked our jobs. All of a sudden we were in this 10-minute conversation."
Afterwards, Wygant explained his innovatively simple methods to his small but rapt audience: "Everything I did was based on a simple observation. I observed that she was interested in my ahi sandwich so we talked about something mutual: the desire to eat ahi wraps."
Wygant was to make one more very important observation that day.
"I looked around [at the five men] and collectively there was two million dollars worth of salaries in front of me," he says. "Two million dollars of what everyone would dream of being, and these guys are looking at me, absorbing everything I'm doing."
Several years, one Marie Claire article, one Dateline feature, and some amazing word-of-mouth later, David Wygant may be the most successful "Dating Consultant" in the world. From his cushy pad atop Seattle's Capitol Hill, he works diligently to help rich and powerful men find love. He travels with them around the world, builds networks of women that fit their interests and who are interested in meeting them, and throws huge parties where they can meet these women and find their dream lover. Rich and powerful men pay him extremely well for these services ($10,000 for a single weekend of work!), for two reasons: 1) They don't have time to meet women because "they're too busy being rich and powerful," and 2) Wygant gets results.
"I play for keeps," he says. "I tell the client, 'Use your imagination, because if you want true love you have to put yourselves out to the masses. You will never be successful in dating if you aren't willing to expose yourself to a mass amount of people.' The average person will expose themselves to one person a month. If you've got 12 chances per year, the chances of you finding somebody who's your proper soul mate are slim and none. That's why most people compromise. That's why there's a divorce rate. When I get together with a guy, I say 'Expect to meet a lot of women, and expect to have fun.' I can find women anywhere in this world that would want to party with one of my clients. And these are not hookers and these are not escorts; they're women who you can take home to mom."
In person, Wygant is handsome, a smooth operator, with a steely glint of go-getter drive. All expected characteristics; what's surprising is his genuine openness. Warm, talkative and funny, it's clear his clients see him as much as a friend as a Human Romance Machine. For some, that kinship inspires a loyalty that could almost be called fierce, as in the case of client Tom, who has been working with Wygant for three years.
THE LOVE PATIENT
I will now get to the real point of this article.
Last December, Wygant was surfing the internet when he happened across the Mercury holiday charity gift auction, and, more specifically, Auction Item #35: "A FEATURE STORY IN THE MERCURY BY JUSTIN WESCOAT SANDERS… ABOUT YOU!" He immediately thought of his all-star client Tom, whom he'd been traveling the globe with for years, looking for love in all the wrong places, and finding it nowhere. He had already been looking for a way to bring the dating action back to Tom's hometown of Portland, and Auction Item #35 seemed like the perfect opportunity. "I will buy this feature story," thought David Wygant, "and I will make this Wescoat Sanders fellow use it to introduce Tom to the ladies of the Rose City! That illustrious newspaper the Mercury, has tens of thousands of rabid readers, who will all get to know Tom in one fell swoop. It's brilliant, I tell you, brilliant! BWA HA HA HA HAAAA!"
So without further ado, here's Tom. Eligible ladies, take note:
For obvious reasons, I can't give you Tom's full name, but I can say I've met him, and he's funny, jovial, intelligent, and kind. He's six feet tall, 175 pounds, with brown hair, blue eyes, and an athletic bod. He's in his 40s, owns homes in both Portland and southern Oregon, and makes an extremely healthy living as an investment manager and traveling professional speaker and trainer. He's romantic, worldly, and wise.
"I always try to look at life from the other person's point of view," says Tom. "I'm not going to be one of these arrogant assholes that's gonna say 'I'm here to control you.' Oh my god. That couldn't be further from the truth. You can have all the money in the world and that doesn't make you a better person. I hate arrogant assholes."
Tom is looking for three very simple things in a woman. Of course he would like to be physically attracted to her, and he hopes to meet a 20-something because he's interested in having children--but above all else he demands that they "have a car, a cell phone, and a job or are going to school."
Such a list might seem curiously simplistic, perhaps even materialistic, but on the contrary; when you're as successful as Tom you don't care about material things. It's not the objects on the list that are important to him, but what they represent: Responsibility.
"I've met more gold diggers than you can imagine," sighs Tom. "If someone is just after the money or they want a sugar daddy, well… get out of here. I've done about everything you can imagine. I swear. I've used nine matchmakers in the U.S. and three outside the U.S. I've been lied to by so many people. If I told you all the bad things that have happened you would say, 'Oh my God, how could you ever go on another date!?' It's because I know she's out there, and I will not stop my search until I find her."
Interested ladies will find themselves with a man possessing "the energy of 10 men," who can "out-dance anyone, even the girls," and who is "hopelessly romantic; it's one of my biggest faults." Gentle and polite, Tom expects nothing from a date "except a smile. It's all I ask. I don't pressure a girl because I wouldn't like it if I was a girl. The only thing I expect from her is a smile."
Should things work out with Tom, however, he will have one little expectation. Frequently recruited to teach his financial planning skills to foreign companies, Tom travels a lot, and yearns for a traveling companion. "I want her to go with me," he says. "I mean it's possible she can't. I'm not forcing her to go if she has something else to do, but on the other hand I want companionship, and the question I would ask is, 'Does this person like to travel?' I think most women do."
In person, Tom is funny, personable, and lively. He's successful, confident, and easygoing, and whoever ends up with him is required to go on amazing adventures into distant lands. Romantic endeavors could be significantly worse.
Gentle reader, the success of David Wygant's mission to find Tom love is ultimately in your hands. Even if you are a lady who is uninterested or spoken for, or if you are a man, you can still help! Try setting up Tom with one of your smokin', single female friends who IS interested. You can contact Tom, or find out how to set him up with a friend, at www.thedwnetwork.com. And GUESS WHAT? If your dabble in matchmaking works out, and Tom finds love, he will reward you with a fabulous prize (see sidebar for full details). If you just want to date Tom directly, and it works out, well, the prize is pretty obvious: a lifetime of love with the man of your dreams.
Height/Weight: 6'0, 175 lb. • Age: mid-40s • Eyes: Blue • Hair: Brown Body Type: Trim, athletic • Smoking: No • Drinking: Sometimes Interests: Traveling, Music, Dancing, Boating, Cinema, Shopping, Tennis Pets: Two dogs, geese, and doves • Occupation: Investment Manager/International Professional Speaker • Income: Healthy • Location: Two homes, one in Portland, one in Southern Oregon • Education: Masters in Business • Looking for: Long-term relationship with a non-smoking, energetic, mid to late-20-something woman interested in having children, traveling, and who is willing to relocate. NOT Looking for: Rude people, alcoholics or drug addicts, mean-spirited people, gold-diggers, smokers
BE A BIG WINNER IN TOM'S GAME OF LOVE!
No interest in dating Tom? Understandable. It happens to the best of us. But do you know someone who might be? Then send 'em on over by contacting Tom or David Wygant at www.thedwnetwork.com.. If Tom dates your special referred lady and FINDS LOVE, Tom will reward you handsomely. If you are SINGLE and help Tom find love, he'll send you on an all-expenses paid vacation to sexy Cabo San Lucas, where you'll have the chance to find a love of your own. If you are IN A RELATIONSHIP and help Tom find love, he'll send you and your snoogy-woogums on an all-expenses paid trip to a destination of your choice in romantic Oregon Wine Country. So hook Tom up with your smokin' single lady friend. If it works out, you'll find yourself on a free trip to a Love-Town of your own. This referral offer goes out to the Ladies AND the Gentlemen!
David Wygant has a new book out, Always Talk to Strangers, co-written with Bryan Swerling (Perigee). It's a comprehensive summary and explanation of Wygant's theories and advice on dating, beginning with the notion that simply talking to the people you encounter in your daily life is the first step towards cashing in on romantic opportunities. To order the book, learn more about Wygant, or contact star client Tom, hit www.thedwnetwork.com.