But now--that's all going to change. Starting today, and until I win the mayor's seat in November, I am running as the "Poor Man's Candidate." That's right, I've taken all my money and placed it in an offshore account, which means as of today I'm poor as a church mouse!
I'm serious! I'm really, really poor! In fact, I'd like to take a moment to let you know how poor I really am..."
...Jim recently put a McDonald's milkshake on layaway.
...he often eats cereal with a fork to save milk.
...Jim's face is pictured on the front of a food stamp.
...when someone asked why Jim was purchasing Hefty bags at K-Mart, he claimed to be "buying luggage."
...Jim once wrestled a squirrel for a peanut.
...when asked why he was carrying a refrigerator box to the dump, Jim said, "I'm relocating my campaign headquarters."
...he's actually voting IN FAVOR of Dignity Village.
...his doormat doesn't say "Welcome," it says "Welfare."
...when Tom Potter dropped by Jim's new campaign headquarters, two roaches tripped him and a rat stole his wallet.
...Jim often reminisces about the time he almost ate in a restaurant.
...even Lars Larson thinks Jim should be on welfare.
...after being asked why he was seen kicking a garbage can down the street, Jim responded, "Haven't you ever seen a mobile home?"
...when Jim accidentally stepped on a roach, his whole family came out singing, "Clap your hands, stomp your feet, thank the Lord that we got meat!"
...when asked what he was doing crawling around inside a dumpster, Jim replied, "Christmas shopping."
...Jim often stands outside of KFC asking to lick people's fingers.
...he rented a 250-foot limo, sat in the backseat and still squished the driver. (Wait... that's a fat joke.)
VOTE JIM FRANCESCONI FOR MAYOR
¨SO POOR, HE CAN´T EVEN BUY AN ELECTION.¨
Paid for by Jim Francesconi´s Friends at the Mercury-- Where all political ads are now half price!