We met at a bar and I immediately realized that I wasn't into you. You were pretty enough, but I don't really go for the female "jock" type. Either way...

We bar-hopped for an hour or two, talking about mundane things and consuming more alcohol. Then, my friend texted to say that another friend was playing at a well-known venue on Hawthorne. I suggested we go and we went.

Upon arrival, the booze must have really kicked in because you became sloppy. Your words slurred and you didn't so much walk, but wobbled into the bar. I introduced you to my friends and you had a crooked smile on your face while slurring "How's the food here?"

We sat at a booth and you ordered a burrito, which I thought an odd choice for a first date. The burrito came and it was massive, but your eyes widened with joy. As you soaked up the booze with bite after massive bite, you grew quieter until it seemed as if you and the burrito were the only ones in the bar. You shoved that damn thing so hard into your face that it seriously grossed me out.

Shortly after your meal, we left and I drove you home. We parked in front of your apartment... I left my lights on as a hint, but felt that you were anticipating a goodnight kiss, if not more. The smell of garlic and beans from your burrito breath filled my car and I, not wanting to be too rude, said I had a "nice time" and wished you goodnight. You reluctantly left.

The smell of that burrito didn't leave my car for 3 days.