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Comment Archives: stories: Feature: Bikes

Re: “A Call to Arms

I don't get it. What else do you want? Bike HOV lanes? Bike-only drivethru's at Burgerville? Barriers between you and cars on every street? Bike culture has reached saturation levels in POrtland. Can't get any higher. I have two bikes. Not hatin', just trying to figure out what you're calling us to arms for. If it's a revolution I'll have to think about it for a while.

0 likes, 3 dislikes
Posted by Bullnose on 06/11/2014 at 10:55 AM

Re: “The First Five Minutes

Jovian - I found out the hard way when I broke my toe that Portland urgent care won't take Oregon health plan. Call around first to save yourself a trip just in case.

1 like, 0 dislikes
Posted by twistofhate on 06/11/2014 at 10:10 AM

Re: “The First Five Minutes

Hold the phone- witnesses required by law to give you their info?? If that's true that's a fucked up law. Just because I happen to be standing somewhere when an idiot does something stupid doesn't mean I have to ID myself. The only time I should be legally required to ID myself is if I've committed a crime. And let me tell you- if you press the issue and threaten me with arrest then sudden my memory if the incident might change to a scenario where you were the one at fault. Leave people alone who aren't in your shit.

0 likes, 11 dislikes
Posted by jimjames on 06/11/2014 at 7:20 AM

Re: “Here's to June

[Yo, TPM. I recalled the following web piece after I ran into your skin-colored coverage.]

USA - from Puritans to Impure-itans

Is there a connection between beautiful New England and entire American cities turned into smoking rubble? There is.
Take same-sex marriage. I would have guessed that a "sin" city (San Francisco? Las Vegas?) would have been the first to legalize it.
Oddly it's been the place where America started that's wanted to be the first place to help bring about the end of America and its values! It's been a Nor'easter of Perversion (helping to fulfill the end time "days of Lot" predicted in Luke 17) that began in (you guessed it) Boston in 2004.
New England has gone from the Mayflower Compact to the Gay Power Impact, from Providence to decadence, from Bible thumpers to God dumpers, from university to diversity to perversity, and from the land of the Great Awakening to God's Future Shakening that will make the Boston bombings look like Walden Pond ripples by comparison!
The same Nor'easter has been spreading south and as far west as Washington State where, after swelling up with pride, Mt. Rainier may wish to celebrate shame-sex marriage by having a blast that Seaddlepated folks can share in lava-land!
The same Luke 17 prediction is tied to the Book of Revelation which speaks of the cities that God will flatten because of same-sexism - including American cities - a scenario I'll have to accept since I can't create my own universe and decree rules for it.
I've just been analyzing the world's terminal "religion" that has its "god," its accessories, its "rites," and even a flag. It's an obsession that the infected converts are willing to live for, fight for - and even die for!
Want more facts? Google "God to Same-Sexers: Hurry Up," "Universal GAYety is Coming," "FOR GAYS ONLY: Jesus predicted," " 'Jesus Never Mentioned Homosexuality' - When Gays Have Birthdays...," "Harvey Milk Stamped 'Out' Forever" and "The Background Obama Can't Cover Up."

0 likes, 1 dislike
Posted by Johnny Ward on 06/09/2014 at 9:52 PM

Re: “Bike Curious

Well, I don't "need" to do anything, actually. I just don't feel like riding in traffic anymore, so I don't. Not least because I got tired of that repeated interaction where someone in a car nearly kills me, this makes me mad so I yell, they get all hurt about it and make it seem like nearly killing me is somehow a lesser bad act than me screaming, "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Because they're embarrassed now, so they're defensive, and then their ego comes back with: "Well, it is right and good that you nearly killed this person. He uses profanity on strangers." As I said; fuck that.

1 like, 0 dislikes
Posted by rich bachelor on 06/09/2014 at 2:22 PM

Re: “Bike Curious

"I don't ride my bike because some bikers are dicks."

^a lame, illogical excuse by a lazy person.

4 likes, 4 dislikes
Posted by Euphonius on 06/09/2014 at 10:08 AM

Re: “Slow Leak

another thing that is going on...

as portland removes driving lanes for bike lanes, we are now in the to ten of worst driving conditions...

people are TIRED of bikes getting more lanes while drivers get less...

and --- the 6% got to be 6% by bikers moving here from other cities - and now that portland is unafordable for min wage hipsters, that number will go down dramatically...

also, a lot of the people I see on bikes are bums smoking a cig while they ride someplace to look for things that they can steal

1 like, 13 dislikes
Posted by John Smith 1 on 06/08/2014 at 3:38 PM

Re: “Slow Leak

most people DONT want to bike to commute or run errands, but most people DO want a nice place to bike in their free time.

We have busses for distance trips without cars - and only a small fraction of the population is young enough and in-shape enough for long daily bike trips - and even they get old with time.

I used to bike when I was in my 20s, now Im in my 50s and I only bike on single-track for fun.

Buy some land or right of way out on sauvie island away from cars and you will see it packed with bikers every weekend and most week nights.

Another thought: put a wall between the I-84 freeway and its bike path - the noise is horrible and so is the exhaust

3 likes, 5 dislikes
Posted by John Smith 1 on 06/08/2014 at 3:30 PM

Re: “Bike Curious

Guys, I've been a bike nut since Greg LeMond was a young hopeful; I rode almost daily for fifteen years all over LOS ANGELES, fer chrissake, and I've never even had a particularly frightening close call.

If Portland's bike corridors scare you, you might want to stay off of the freeways in your car – the cocoon of safety you feel you're in there is almost entirely an illusion. If one of those semis does something stupid enough, you are going to die, period. Your side-curtain airbag will get squashed just as flat as your gooey, dead-ass torso. It is –statistically– the most dangerous thing you do with any regularity, yet you take a few precautions, stay aware, and get on these death factories all the time without a second thought.

Feeling naked and defenseless on a bike is natural. But the idea you're any better defended in your car against a tanker truck than you are on a bike against an Escalade is based more on your feelings than the laws of physics.

Part of my spotless bike record is luck, yes, but so is your (and my) ability to survive I-5. But most of my staying upright is due to following a few simple principles of safety and staying in a high state of mindfulness. Also, if a part of your regular route is stressful and gnarly, find a way around it. The extra few minutes are usually more than worth the peace of mind, and it is NOT hard to find mellow alternates in PDX. And really, y'all, if breezing down Ankeny or Clinton is your idea of terror, you need to harden up in a general sense. I mean, come on.

10 likes, 0 dislikes
Posted by torkfool on 06/08/2014 at 2:04 PM

Re: “Slow Leak

The City of Portland certainly has lost some of its bike mojo, years of budget cuts and a lack of political leadership have left the Portland Bicycle Plan for 2030 stalled. But regionally, as far as the BTA goes, I'm surprised Rex Burkholder so quickly forgot his own vote on one of their flagship campaigns for ~$18M for bike projects.

1 like, 2 dislikes
Posted by Bikey on 06/08/2014 at 7:32 AM

Re: “Slow Leak

Erin: maps. Heard of them? Boo hoo hoo.

Just today I used the sharrows to ride from I-205 to Grand on a route that I hadn't bothered researching and it was fine. It's not difficult.

5 likes, 8 dislikes
Posted by Chunty McHutchence on 06/07/2014 at 5:25 PM

Re: “Date by Bike!



Posted by Trident on 06/07/2014 at 8:47 AM

Re: “A Call to Arms

To everyone who's commented thus far:

Jesus, you guys sound like the Silver Sneakers Club after finding out Shari's ran out of sherbet.

9 likes, 2 dislikes
Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey on 06/06/2014 at 2:29 PM

Re: “Bike Curious

I'm amused by people telling Erik what he forgot to include in his list of reasons why he doesn't ride his bike. Those people are way more in-tune with Erik's life than he is, obviously.

2 likes, 2 dislikes
Posted by Graham on 06/06/2014 at 9:38 AM

Re: “Slow Leak

I recently dropped some dough on a new road bike, and was looking forward to getting around on it. I was trying to commute to NW Naito and tour my neighborhood between Foster and Woodstock. It didn't take long before I was discouraged by disappearing bike lanes thrusting me out, exposed, onto a highway with traffic whizzing by; and confusing, disjointed and inefficient routes, clogged by closed roads due to construction and putting me into a minefield of retired train tracks. Then it rained on me (I hadn't added fenders yet), and I haven't brought the bike out since.

I love the bikeways, I just wish they would take me to where I need to go. I'm jealous of the people for whom this system works.

8 likes, 2 dislikes
Posted by Erin Seale on 06/06/2014 at 8:53 AM

Re: “Slow Leak

I use the Greenways every day, to take my daughter to preschool, to get groceries, and I think they are mostly alright. Except that some drivers feel the need to speed down the stop sign free streets, sometimes slamming on their brakes for the speed bumps, driving aggressively, and even harassing me for taking the lane. And then there are all the drivers who roll through the stop signs crossing the Greenways. Sure, there are always going to be jerks, but I think part of the problem is that most people are not aware of what the Greenways are supposed to be for.

9 likes, 1 dislike
Posted by Amy Subach on 06/06/2014 at 8:22 AM

Re: “A Call to Arms

I call it a bicycle; a "bike" is a nickname. Nicknames are for friends, and bicycles are no friends of mine.

0 likes, 4 dislikes
Posted by LawyerPepper on 06/06/2014 at 8:11 AM

Re: “A Call to Arms

Shut the fuck up and go ride your fucking bike, white man.

2 likes, 2 dislikes
Posted by George Hayduke on 06/06/2014 at 3:32 AM

Re: “The First Five Minutes

Portland Urgent Care, located at 42nd and Sandy Blvd (next to the Hollywood Theater) specializes in (along with lots of other stuff), bicycle accidents. Check out their somewhat entertaining website at

3 likes, 1 dislike
Posted by Jovian on 06/05/2014 at 9:06 PM

Re: “Bike Curious

God bless you, Erik Henriksen. For the longest time I've felt like the only resident of inner SE who cringes over the current Portlandia bike love-in. I was car-less for years at a time in Portland when seeing another lone cyclist on the street was cause to exchange friendly bell-rings of solidarity. But these days it's strictly amateur hour as hordes of unpredictable, clueless, entitled, helmetless, unlit, slow-ass cyclists rule the streets. (Or so it seems to me.) "Bike-friendly" does not mean ride anywhere you want, however you want. Thanks for offering a critical (and hopeful) perspective when everyone else is chugging Kool-Aid.

2 likes, 4 dislikes
Posted by Grilch on 06/05/2014 at 8:18 PM

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