Mr. Greener
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Mar 17 Mr. Greener commented on Conflicted with My Philosophies in the Workplace.
Most of the problems the manager lists could be fixed with lunchtime "Matlock" airings in the break room. When in doubt, more "Matlock."
Feb 2 Mr. Greener commented on Is Your Band Sexist, or Are Womxn Just Annoying?.
People have been trying to censor rock 'n' roll since Elvis shook his hips on Ed Sullivan. The more you label a band offensive, the more interest they tend to garner. The writers make some good points, but I'm not sure anything but the listeners' market can really change any of this since every all male band with a potentially offensive name has enough women supporting it that basically don't care. And I've given an honest listen to a number of feminist rockers, and even they sometimes say some pretty offensive things to those of us not inclined to the scatological. So I guess there is no other solution than a Pussy Riot.
Feb 2 Mr. Greener commented on I, Anonymous.
Dear ExtraSalt, you may have some good points, but the real question is what are you doing this Friday? I rock a serious hat on my receding hairline and have Febreeze the ashtray smell off my Cure T-shirt. And if my 27 year old kid is still living at home, can I still be considered a breadwinner or at least a gamer enabler?
Jan 18 Mr. Greener commented on As Donald Trump Becomes President, Portland’s Streets Will Be Chaotic.
Will each side write their signs in womyn friendly CAPs or use the patriarchal Palmer method?
Jan 18 Mr. Greener commented on I, Anonymous.
To the Distinguished Nauseous Young of Portland: 1. Older men wear hats because they're cold or bald. 2. Older men smell like ashtrays because younger hipsters are constantly bumming smokes from them, so they never get a chance to quit. 3. Everyone complains about the government in Portland, not just old men, in fact we just had a riot of sorts over the new president. 4. Older men may be flirting with you not because they want to repel you but because they just want to make sure you don't forget to fill their coffee order or possibly because they actually hope you will talk them up to your now single mother, whom your father left for a 22 year old barista.
Dec 1, 2016 Mr. Greener commented on I, Anonymous.
Yes, leave the children at home, that's what responsible parents do, leave young children at home unattended so the barren may shop unimpeded. This is now the second I, A in a month where some entitled whatever complains about someone with children. And we wonder why PDX is turning into a gentrified yuppie wasteland devoid of life when clowns like this actually think their mere existence entitles them to a store sans shopping carts.
Nov 25, 2016 Mr. Greener commented on I, Anonymous.
The context of this is unclear -- is the barren poster friends with fecund female? Or is this more the typical Portlandia sneer at those who choose to procreate 1.5 potential ACLU lawyers vs. the 5 to 8 GOP vote-riggers per Red State family? If someone looks down on you for not having children, why are you friends in the first place? And sure, every parent dealing with kids just loves to hear the advice of the child-free, so go on with your bad self, it's not like you're raising anyone who will pay for your entitlements when you're rotting away in a nursing home reading "The Female Eunuch" to the flowers on the wall.
Oct 21, 2016 Mr. Greener commented on I, Anonymous.
Dear transplant: As the above comments, particularly by zipitup indicate, you must first be struggled, in the Maoist sense, by zealous Portland comrades who wear their anarcho-credentials like a badge of honor as they berate Holocaust victims for being anti-Semitic before you are considered pure enough to live in a utopian paradise like the Rose City. We will shave your head, force you to listen to an incapable-of-tuning indie rock band no one actually likes but which receives endless praise for concisely addressing complex social issues within a three-chord framework, and shame you for giggling quietly as the Naked Bike Ride carries thousands of folks who are telling the clothes-minded off with their brave, ball-busting (literally) statement of nudist empowerment which they would never tolerate if similarly practiced by the three homeless guys outside your favorite coffee shop refusing to sit for your lies or stand for a beer. Now go and put a bird on it and practice your mantra: "Sustainability, empowerment, Voodoo Donuts"
Sep 8, 2016 Mr. Greener commented on Bull in a China Shop.
"Dominant straight white males." Okay, so what you're saying is you'd rather not hang out on West Burnside every Friday or Saturday night.