how would i know?
What a sweet, sweet man to do that in front of all those folks. That'll teach 'em not to be so tolerant.
Bon voyage, Monsieur Venner -- I hope that there is indeed a hell, and that you're getting an introductory tour of the place right about now.
Louis Armstrong's 'What a Wonderful World' would fit nicely.
Kiss your pearly whites goodbye, impoverished kiddies! Oh, how we hate you. Oh, how we absolutely loathe you and your fluoride-starved guts.
Tonight we raise a glass of extra-sugarified Riesling (because all of us anti-fluoridationistas can afford monthly dental visits) to toast to your imminent dental pain while twisting our mustaches and singing our praises to Goddess McCarthy, Hitler, and to our master strategist (and rising star in the Mercury commenting arena), An Inconvenient Tooth.
Maybe now we can finally get back to working on our real passions: outlawing vaccines, documenting chem-trails, trying to bring back smallpox, unmasking Obama as the Reptilian chancellor of the New World Order he really is, and debunking this 'global warming' nonsense that you libs keep harping about.
(Oh, stop your crying, kids, or you're going to get tears in that 32-oz. Mountain Dew you're sucking on.)
"...you'd think astronauts would be dismissive of Bowie's "Space Oddity," detailing, as it does, astronaut death. Not the case."
Actually, they changed the words so as not to include the death part at all. The "tell my wife i love her very much" and "your circuit's dead, there's something wrong" lines were replaced by some drama-less re-entry talk. They gave a happy ending to a song about a not-so-happy ending, skipping over the whole point of the damn thing.
Geez, don't let these guys get a hold of '2001: A Space Odyssey' -- they would make the apes vegetarians and would have HAL be more understanding and not so murderous.
I'm fine with vaccines. If i ever have kids, they will be vaccinated. What else? Homeopathy is bullshit. Bush wasn't in on 9/11. Tsunamis are not the result of a wrathful god. I use fluoride toothpaste (though i don't swallow it, as that would do me no good -- it works topically). Obama isn't a Nigerian-born Muslim. Astrology is rubbish. I don't mind the fact that our water is treated with scary-sounding chemicals in order to make it safe to drink. I don't think gay people are pretending. I wasn't surprised when the world didn't end last year. I don't believe the Red Coats are coming.
I also don't think that, should we end up going ahead with the fluoridation of our water, any real harm will come to anyone because of it. And i don't think there will be an imminent and immediate environmental catastrophe, with salmon and plants suddenly dying off in huge numbers. But that doesn't make this a good idea. And it doesn't mean that we can just force it on people who don't want or need it. It's not the cure-all that it's hyped to be. Not even close. Unfortunately, things just aren't that simple. Your teeth (and especially your children's) will still rot if you don't brush them and choose to drink soda all day, which are the main reasons behind poor dental health -- not a lack of fluoride. You can get all the flu shots you want, but if you go around licking door handles and sticking your filthy fingers in your nose and spending tons of time with infected people, you're still going to get the flu.
What else should we add to the water supply? I mean, if we're going to force medication on people whether they need it or not (and spend millions of dollars doing so), how about we at least focus on things that kill them in greater numbers than does tooth decay? How about throwing in some drugs to fight type-2 diabetes for the segment of the population that can't muster up the willpower to exercise and eat a better diet? What about throwing in something that reduces nicotine cravings for those of us who smoke?
OR, maybe we could all just have a little more imagination, put a little more thought into things, accept fewer lunches from lobbyists, and figure out a way to deliver these medications directly (i.e., efficiently) to those who actually need them. For fuck's sake -- we have fucking robots rolling around on Mars! I'm pretty sure we're capable of figuring out a better way to blow out a candle than to cover the entire room with fire extinguisher foam.
Salt is not water. Salt is not a public utility that everybody pays for.
Also, the extreme majority of fluoridated salt isn't poured right down the drain and spread into the environment like the extreme majority of fluoridated water is. The equivalent would be like taking a pound of salt and covering every surface in your entire kitchen instead of just using the pinch that you need and putting it directly on your food. Both methods work, but one is a little silly and wasteful.
I am not against using fluoride to protect my (or the poor, poor children's) teeth. What i am against, however, is using a shotgun to kill a gnat. Surely we can figure out a much better (and a waaaay more efficient) way to deal with this problem than to just simply and lazily resort to a blanket-cure thought up in the 40's.
Now, if you'll excuse me, i'm going to go bathe in a pool of spot-remover to get this little stain off of my shirt.
Alright then -- back to talking about SMILES, goddamnit. Isn't it nice to take a two-and-a-half-minute break from all of the horror and vanity and dissension and hate that we usually read of every once in a while?
(Look what you've done, I,A. Just look at what you've done. All of this because of an ill-considered, misplaced jab at a former reporter. Shame on you, you smile-taking-but-not-appropriately-returning jerknose. Way to poop diarrhea on an otherwise uplifting and awww-inspiring 'rant'. Now go to your room and think about what you've done, godfuckingdamnit.)
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