http://www.portlandmercury.com/portland/savage-love/Category?oid=22115 Comments On: Savage Love en-us Copyright 2009 Portland Mercury. All rights reserved. This RSS file is offered to individuals, Portland Mercury readers, and non-commercial organizations only. Any commercial websites wishing to use this RSS file, please contact Portland Mercury. webmaster@portlandmercury.com (Portland Mercury Webmaster) Sun, 22 Nov 2009 00:00:01 -0800 Sun, 22 Nov 2009 01:15:00 -0800 Foundation http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss
using "retarded" to mean slow is just fine in my book (like "that flat tire was retarding that car's progress"), but when it's only used in a disparaging manner, then, sure, I have a problem with it. that's not to say you're not free to use it, just that you should be aware that if somebody objects to that usage, maybe it's not up to YOU to decide if it's okay or not.

if a gay person called you on your use of the word "faggot", would you continue to use it around them? or would you make a consideration based on your relationship with that person and decide maybe your own intentions aren't worth the possible offense you're making?

(as for calling yourself a cracker or a honky, well, if you're a cracker or a honky, then it's your right to do so.... do you also call black people niggers, as they've reclaimed that word for themselves in some ways?)

ah, internet arguments, how fun!
Posted by jonashpdx]]> Sat, 21 Nov 2009 11:26:18 -0800 Portland Mercury Posted by Jimmie]]> Fri, 20 Nov 2009 19:36:26 -0800 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:14:21 -0800 Portland Mercury
I think Dan should be given credit for already removing "retarded" from his vocabulary--he's written several articles using "leotarded" instead. You're beating a dead horse here. Also, do you really live at the airport?
Posted by sarahschmara]]> Thu, 19 Nov 2009 16:30:16 -0800 Portland Mercury
As for the emfem TG/gay boy... talk to HR, but there is no reason you can't use the ladies room. Most of the stalls have doors anyways... I'm sure some TG is more anxious about being accepted than getting in the ladies pants in the restroom. Its not like she's into girls anyways.

According to the law, however... a business has to be "reasonably accommodating" for protected classes... if the designate a gender neutral restroom then use that one. There was a case at Boeing where a TG wanted and kept using the ladies room after being told to use a unisex single person restroom... she was fired for not complying, and sued Boeing. She lost for not conforming to their reasonable accommodation.
Posted by Kerry]]> Thu, 19 Nov 2009 11:01:20 -0800 Portland Mercury Posted by jonashpdx]]> Thu, 19 Nov 2009 09:49:05 -0800 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> 1. It is butting into another persons' sexual life where that request wasn't asked for. The current situation is not harmful to his niece, as much as he thinks it is. The mother is a far better judge than the gay uncle.
2. As an uncle, you are too far off the relation-train to offer that type of advise, when parental figures exist. At best, the uncle might bring it up to her parents, but to address her directly is out of line.
3. Talking to the boy directly is *completely* out of line, and violates her privacy and pretty much every known "common sense" laws of things not to do to a 14-year-old. I'm too lazy to look it up, but it would conflict with Savage's other advise given previously in the column. "Butt the Fuck Out. None of Your Business."
Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Sat, 07 Nov 2009 05:33:01 -0800 Portland Mercury Your column is always (well, almost always) full of good stuff Dan, but I think your advice to ACLU was some of the best I've seen. Just another example and reminder why you do what you do (and quite well), and why the rest of us just read, learn and appreciate what you have to say. Don't ever stop.
Posted by JohnM.]]> Fri, 06 Nov 2009 11:32:06 -0800 Portland Mercury
"Hey mom and dad, you know how I'm 14 years old and all? Right, so my girlfriend's uncle pulled me aside today. He told me he was gay and that I could talk to him about anything at all and it would just be between him and me. Weird, huh?"
Posted by peenew]]> Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:45:12 -0800 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]>
moronic. Why not? Do people really think there exists relationships out there where someone isn't going to get hurt, or that YOU could prevent it?
Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Thu, 05 Nov 2009 10:22:59 -0800 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq, maybe it relates to an ungodly percentage of his writership. I know that I'd try to discourage fantasy letters in his shoes, and I grok the simple expedient of picking one to demonstrate that such letters are emotionally transparent and can be publicly vivisected.
Posted by Scientivore]]> Wed, 04 Nov 2009 23:36:56 -0800 Portland Mercury Posted by jsmith]]> Wed, 04 Nov 2009 07:27:25 -0800 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Mon, 02 Nov 2009 12:13:44 -0800 Portland Mercury
I really hope this is a fake, and if its not... someone please get those kids out of that home.

Rich - Come to Jesus is the "this is it or else" talk with someone where you lay it all on the table. IF they can't change then ya DTMFA
Posted by Kerry]]> Thu, 29 Oct 2009 15:39:35 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by rich bachelor]]> Thu, 29 Oct 2009 12:55:58 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by mashintraffic]]> Fri, 23 Oct 2009 21:27:26 -0700 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Thu, 22 Oct 2009 12:47:23 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by dictionarycomment]]> Thu, 22 Oct 2009 12:07:09 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by JasonC]]> Thu, 15 Oct 2009 23:35:04 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by PTFO]]> Thu, 15 Oct 2009 15:11:27 -0700 Portland Mercury Posted by coolestboyintheworld]]> Thu, 15 Oct 2009 11:12:44 -0700 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Wed, 14 Oct 2009 17:50:25 -0700 Portland Mercury
I look back on the trials of the civil rights movement and I see the same stupidity going on now. How does a gay marriage diminish my hetero marriage? It doesn't... I'll be no less married because two men or two women are married too.

Let them marry with the same rights and plights as straight people have. Marriage, divorce, etc... why not?
Posted by Kerry]]> Wed, 14 Oct 2009 17:06:44 -0700 Portland Mercury
And here's news to ya, I am not profitting from my partner financially, if anything it's the other way around. I LOVE her enough that I don't want there to be any problems financially when I die. And when we bought our house TOGETHER we were told that the direct right of inheritance would be written into the mortgage but that in Oregon sometimes that goes into a funny gray area if somebody's...say...next of kin decides after they're dead that maybe this whole gay thing was the surviving partner's fault and decides to make things difficult. Try losing your WIFE and fighting to keep your house. Not fun.

And...if my WIFE (I can use that term but when I check the "single" box on my federal taxes or any other legal document--if I wrote it I would be committing fraud) should God forbid be unconscious at a CHRISTIAN hospital (Providence, Good Sam, Emanuel, Adventist, etc etc) and not able to convey her wishes I will most likely need to get my lawyer to see her.

So stay partnered. Enjoy your back door. I'm not asking for special treatment. I just want to have the same rights as my married straight brother.
Posted by spartacus]]> Tue, 13 Oct 2009 13:39:58 -0700 Portland Mercury tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> http://imgur.com/UCHzQ.jpg
Posted by ?pqM)mH{5i*7V7wVNiH?tcvUk'j>tH\VF5!V+00HY?jgK7@iA<_(B0Mii*:@e9Iq]]> Fri, 09 Oct 2009 21:16:32 -0700 Portland Mercury